She shook her head. “Not at all. It’s basically a sweatshirt. With your jeans and black Vans. Oh, arenas are cold.” She handed me a long black cardigan. “Do you want me to do your hair?”
This seemed like a lot of work. Honestly, I hadn’t even gone to this much trouble for Hana’s party—and that actuallywasone of our dates.
But I supposed if his friends thought we were dating, then this was a date. And it did sound very date-like. All I could think about was what Cass said—maybe Daniel was looking to renegotiate the parameters of our relationship. But the problem was, I still wasn’t sure I wanted to do that. On Monday Cass said I was resisting Daniel because I was afraid of getting hurt again. And I supposed it was true—because Devin had hurt me a lot. Not that I expected Daniel to ever hurt me that way.
But the more I cared about Daniel, the more it would hurt if things didn’t work out. Or if he didn’t feel the same way I did.
It was just safer for me to keep this professional. I could do that.
The arena was pretty far from our neighborhood, so Cass picked me up at five for the six o’clock game. I kind of expected them to bedressed differently, too, since they were pining for a player and all. But no. Standard Cass uniform, jeans and a sweatshirt. This sweatshirt was kind of funny—orange with the Cheetos logo on it. But even if they were dressed exactly as they always were, it was clear to me that Cass was nervous. As we drove to the arena, they kept pulling at the back of their neck. And they weren’t really saying much.
Things had been good between Cass and me for the last couple of days. I’d been trying hard not to pour too much of my own drama on them. I hadn’t even told them about that threatening comment from GamesLost on Earl’s Whispers, and if they’d seen it, they didn’t mention it to me. I tried not to obsess about that comment so much—my friends were right; I was focusing too much on things that were probably unimportant. Right now, my focus should only be on making sure my friend was okay.
“You good, Cass? You seem twitchy.”
They shrugged, but their eyes didn’t leave the road. “Nah, it’s good. I’m not worried.”
“Not worried about what?”
“Not worried about anything. It’s fine.”
I could see a tension in their jaw, the tension that usually only came out at exam time. Or that time they did the timed coding test at school.
“You and Owen dating yet?” I hoped they would have told me if they were.
“No. Just friends.”
“He agreed to come to Starbucks with us after, right?” The plan was for Owen and Cass to join us at the café next door after the game so I could meet him, but then he and Cass would leave us alone when Daniel and I worked on his math. It was, of course, all arranged that way so Cass would have a reason to be alone with Owen.
“Yeah. But ...”
“But what?”
“But I don’t know.” They were quiet for a while, staring at the road in front of them.
Cass was my best friend, and my best friend seemed to be anxious right now.
“Cass, talk to me. I’m here. I’m the one you’re going to move to New YorkandSilicon Valley with, to take the tech world by storm one day.”
They smiled, remembering our old pledge to each other. “With 100 percent more diversity in the CEOs.”
“And 100 percent less unnecessary rocket ships.”
“Fine.” They sighed. “Owen said he wanted me to meet his friends. I doubt they are expecting ... this.” Cass’s voice shook.
I raised a brow. “And what’s wrong withthat? Do you have any reason to think Owen has a problem with how you present?” I’d never known Cass to be self-conscious about their identity. But then I didn’t really know what it was like to be them.
“No, I mean, he uses my pronouns fine. He’s never had an issue.”
“But you’ve never seen him with all his friends. His teammates.”
Cass didn’t say anything, which was enough answer for me. Had this guy avoided telling his friends that his new friend or whatever Cass was to him was nonbinary? Maybe I needed to stop automatically assuming anything about people anymore, but I remembered Daniel’s comments about the racism he’d experienced. I doubted hockey was a bastion of LGBTQ2+ support.
But Cass said Owen was out. I looked at my friend. “Daniel said Owen’s team is cool,” I said. “And he’s totally into you if he wanted his friends to meet you.”
They shrugged. “I guess time will tell. Still nervous, though. How are you feeling about meeting Daniel’s team?”
“Also nervous. Daniel told his freaking mother that I’m his girlfriend, and she’ll be there.” I looked over at Cass. “Glad you’ll be there, too.”
