Jake came back into the kitchen and leaned against the wall, watching our group standing around Addie as she analyzed the platter of donuts, making her big decision. He wore some black lounge pants that were molded to his ass and hung loose on his legs. His mauve thermal stretched across his chest. I felt drool pool in my mouth.
Addie finally picked a chocolate-glazed long john. Looking up at Steph, she said, “I had a snack tray. I woke Jakey up in Momma’s bed. They were real tired. He said he was going to make me pancakes, but then he remembered we were coming here.” She took a big bite and chewed, not noticing the smiles and looks that Drew, Steph, or Jake’s parents were exchanging. As for me, I wanted to disappear. Could the floor just swallow me up whole right now? That’d work for me. Swallowing, Addie caught sight of Jake. “Can you make pancakes after your next sleepover, Jakey? Maybe with chocolate chips?”
“Yeah, Jakey,” Drew called over. “When is that next sleepover?”
“Can I come?” Steph asked, wiping away a tear or two of laughter as she looked at Jake. Addie had moved over and stood in front of him. I’m sure she was giving him her pleading eyes.
Jake leaned down and picked her up, swinging her to his hip. “Sure, peanut. Now, how about some cartoons?”
He headed down the hall with her to his den, a raised middle finger behind his back to his siblings. While I knew it was for them, I wondered what his parents would think? Watching them all burst out laughing, I knew this was a group I felt at home in. There was a lot of teasing, but so much love weaving through it all. What would that be like to be able to depend on that around you, always? I wish I knew.
20
Pop-Pop
Jake
Jesus, I wondered if I was pitting out my thermal. This brunch was beginning to feel like an interrogation. We were all gathered around the farm table in my dining room. Addie was at the end near my dad on the other side of Ivy. Ads sat on her knees, occasionally dropping food to my ever-present dog. My dad had decided to be her partner in crime and was adding more food to her plate when needed. Judging by the conspiring looks she was giving him, they were becoming fast friends.
Clearly Dad had been won over by this pint-sized dynamo. However that left my mom free to grill Ivy and me to her heart’s desire. Steph and Drew weren’t helping matters, oh no. They were joining in, asking as many questions as they could. Ivy looked like she was minutes from bolting, and I didn’t blame her. Hell, I might beat her out the door.
“So, Ivy, tell me about Addie’s dad. Is he in the picture?” my mom asked from the head of the table to my left, taking a sip of her orange juice.
I nearly spit out my coffee. “Mom, that’s none of our business.”
My mom looked offended, like I’d been the one asking her personal questions. “What? I’m sorry. I was just making conversation. Addie is just delightful, and I wondered what family the two of them had around.”
I turned to Ivy to my right and whispered, “Sorry, Ivy. You don’t need to—”
She placed a hand on my forearm and squeezed. “It’s fine.” Looking past me to my mom, she said, “Addie’s dad is Noah. We were in college together and dated through our time at school and for some time after.” She took a drink of her coffee, and it appeared to fortify her. “He’s a great guy, a friend from childhood. Being a father wasn’t in his plan. He was always headed to somewhere else after graduation. He’s doing a lot of good in the world, but as a result, he’s not in Addie’s life as much as he would like.”
She sat back and took a bite of her pancakes, but I could see that her hand was shaking. I slid my hand to her thigh and squeezed, wanting her to understand that she wasn’t alone.
She glanced at my mom, and I saw that Ivy was fighting more than a few tears. “Noah offered to change his plans when I shared I was pregnant, but I turned him down. The two of us both come from families with means, but without a lot of affection. Noah has a good heart and wanted to give to the world, and I didn’t want to stand in his way. Addie knows who he is and sees him when he visits. She also knows he is helping to change the world. I’m not keeping her from him but also not making him change who he is or asking him to give up something that means so much to him. That wouldn’t be fair to any of us.” She took a deep breath and looked past my mom and toward the living room, her gaze on the front window. “Noah’s a good guy, just not one ready to be here, to settle down. Even if he did, we’re friends. We parent together when he’s around, but nothing more.” She turned back to the table and shrugged.
I noted that she had no issue having this conversation in front of Addie, though she wasn’t trying to pull her into it. That told me that she looked at this in a matter-of-fact way and tried not to make it a big deal to Addie, more that it was the way things were. How in the hell had she figured this all out on her own?
My eyes met Drew and Steph’s across the table. They both looked like they’d like to have a few words with Noah, more like with Ivy’s parents, but shockingly for them, they were quiet. Turning my head, I looked at my mom. Her mouth had fallen open, though I don’t think she realized it. Closing it, she swallowed, then whispered, “Might I say, Ivy, that you are wise beyond your years and have done an amazing job with your daughter.”
“Chief!” Addie squealed as Chief licked her fingers. I caught my dad’s eye, and he winked. I guessed he was working on entertainment at that end of the table.
My mom shook her head at my dad, then she looked back to Ivy. “Tell me more about your parents. Or do you have siblings? Do they all live close?”
I squeezed Ivy’s leg again. I’d tell my mom to cut the questions again, but Ivy appeared to be okay. Ivy took another bite of pancakes and then put her fork down. Seemed this answer was going to take a minute or two, or she was done. Part of me was eager to hear if she’d share more about her family than I already knew.
“Well, Margot, I’m going to start by saying that I love my parents, but what my family looks like is pretty much the opposite of what you all have shown me today.”
My mom sat back, I’m sure not knowing if that was a good or bad thing.
Ivy didn’t let her wonder for long. “I’m an only child, so my house was pretty quiet.”
“Yep, opposite for sure,” Drew muttered.
Steph snorted.
I looked at Ivy to see that she was giving those two a tolerant smile. She continued. “We’re from Madison. My dad is a banker. My mom stayed at home and met friends for lunch at the country club. Honestly?” She looked across the table at Steph who nodded at her. Ivy had mentioned they talked about her family when Steph stopped by the bookstore. I was grateful that it seemed Ivy was pulling some strength from her.
Ivy continued. “I’m honestly surprised, knowing my parents for all these years, that they became parents in the first place. I often wonder if I was unplanned or if they just felt like it was something they were supposed to do. The next part of being an adult or something.” She looked down at her lap where she was twisting a cloth napkin back and forth. I’m guessing she realized what she was doing because she dropped it and smoothed it out, then looked back at my mom, sitting up straight as she continued.
