Walking beside him feels strange. I’m not surprised when we don’t go through the front door. Instead, he leads me around the house.
There’s a big patio, a pool, and beyond that, some distance away, the lake glistens. Remarkable place to live, no doubt. But we keep walking. We pass a small cluster of citrus trees, and beyond them is a white gravel path that leads to a door set into the side of the building. I’m almost sure this was an addition,not part of the original structure. A few steps descend into the ground toward it. Lake goes down and knocks. Of course, I knew Snow lived in the basement of his parents’ house, but I always pictured it differently. Long, narrow windows sit just above ground level, probably the only natural light down there, but every one of them is covered with blinds. The door opens slowly, and there he is. Snow. My heart skips a beat; he’s such a looker. His eyes move between his dad and me. Lake gives him a small, harmless smile.
"Look who showed up, son. Maybe you’d like to have a word with him?"
Snow stays silent, just looking at me. I’ve never been good at reading his face. The only expressions I ever understood were the ones he made in pleasure, when I was riding his dick.
Lake doesn’t wait for his son’s answer. He heads back up the steps and crosses the lawn toward the patio. As he passes me, he throws a quick look my way and mutters a casual ‘bye’. There’s maybe the faintest hint of amusement on his face.
I’m left standing on the bottom step, staring at Snow.
"Hi," I say, my voice trembling. "I know I shouldn’t have come. I realize that. But I just wanted a short conversation."
I expect him to slam the door in my face, but instead he steps back. That’s his way of saying yes.
I know how this will go, mostly me talking. Snow doesn’t say much, if anything.
I step inside slowly. It’s a big space, kind of like a living room. I see three closed doors leading to other rooms. It looks like Snow has a full apartment down here, a way to keep himself separate from the family upstairs. He moves to the couch and sits down, his calm face turning toward me.
I join him, sitting close to him. What shocks me most is that I can’t smell him.
Snow never used Allure suppressants. Why has he started now? And I loved his scent so much, the fresh air over the heather moors, the crisp morning breeze.
He and I are High Mates, a compatibility people say is nearly perfect, just one step below True Mates. Our chemistry was always easy.
"You’re on suppressants," I whisper.
But he doesn’t answer; well, Snow rarely responds to things that are obvious. If I’ve already noticed it, there’s no reason for him to confirm it. That’s always been his approach.
"Well, I got your texts, but after twelve years, a breakup by text feels a little… I don’t know. Something’s missing. It makes it seem like all those years meant nothing to you. You didn’t even give me the chance to say—"
I stop. He watches me closely, that eternal calm of his now driving me crazy, even though I always valued it before. I’ve always been nervous, a little shy, and his cool, grounding energy balanced me. Maybe that was the secret behind why we are High Mates, why being with him always felt so right. And I don’t want to lose that, but I know that once he’s made a decision, there’s nothing I can do to change it.
"I know what we had was never really possible, but there’s something I’ve wanted to tell you. Something I’ve carried all these years but never let myself say, because I didn’t want to hurt you, and I didn’t want to hurt myself." My voice drops to a whisper, emotion swelling in my chest.
Snow’s gaze flicks to my torso, like he can actually see it, the wound in me, and he probably can. His gift is unique. He sees things others miss: energy, invisible emotions, colors, and sounds from reality that an ordinary mortal could never comprehend.
I turn toward him and instinctively reach out. My fingers land on his solid, muscular shoulder.
"I love you."
The words shake in my throat, and my fingers drift across his body. Dear Fate, I’ve missed the warmth of his skin, his touch.
Snow doesn’t pull away, but he doesn’t respond either. Something has changed. What used to be easy between us, smooth and effortless, feels broken now. Our touch had always flowed into hours of lovemaking, and it was divine. Because sex with Snow was never just sex. It was magic.
My fingers graze his shoulder and slide down his bicep. I’m facing him fully now, but he hasn’t moved from the position he took when he first sat down. The only sign he notices my closeness is the slight bulge in his pants. For all his distance and restraint, Snow is still a man, one with a strong libido. Physical touch always got to him, and this time is no different.
But that’s not important right now, and it’s not why I came here. I decided to come clean, explain myself, and bare my soul to him.
"Snow… I miss you so much it feels like my heart is shattering. I wake up thinking of you, I fall asleep thinking of you. Everything else I do is mechanical, just going through the motions, caring for the kids, talking with Tim. It all feels like a dream, because I know you won’t come back, I know there won’t be a night when you step out of the shadows to hold me, to touch me, to be inside me. I’ve lost all of it, and it terrifies me, because it hurts. It hurts so damn much, Snow."
Snow slowly turns his head and looks at me. Up close, his face is even more flawless, with those even features, the masculine line of his jaw, and the straight nose.
"Snow, please, make it stop. I’m begging you!" I plead, because it’s all I can hope for, some relief. Not that he’ll change his mind, but… maybe a helping hand? "I know you can. I know you can heal the wounds in people’s hearts and close them."
Tears stream down my face. My emotions have no barrier now. I can only whisper, "Please, I’m begging you. Don’t leave me with a broken heart. It hurts, it hurts so bad…"
His eyes travel across my face. I wish I could read him better, but I never could. His true thoughts and feelings were always locked away. He’s never opened up to me, never let me in. I suspect that most of his brothers see him as a mystery. The only person who quietly understands him is his dad.
