She needs time to breathe, to process.
We get her things inside, and for the first time all day, I see her shoulders relax. It’s subtle, but it’s there. The weight she’s been carrying isn’t gone, but it’s less burdened now.
I turn to her. “Take your time to unpack and get settled. There’s nothing off-limits here. Treat this place like your home for now. I’m cooking Sunday roast tonight, so you can come out for dinner, or come hang with us today if you’re feeling up for it.” I can’t help myself, I pull her into a hug. And then Tyler steps in and wraps his arms around us too.
“Roomies,” he says with a grin.
Camille actually laughs. That sound alone makes all of this worth it.
“Thank you both for helping me today,” she says softly. “I’m gonna go unpack.”
“Just holler if you need anything,” I tell her, meaning every word.
I’m surprised when barely an hour later, she comes out of her room.
Wearing a red bikini.
My brain short-circuits.
My jaw practically on the floor.
Yeah, I’ve seen her naked already. But somehow, seeing her likethisin the sunlight, in my house… it feels different.
Dangerous. Like a memory come to life that I really want to relive.
Fuck. I need to stop.
I can’t be looking at her like that, not after what she just went through today.
“You wanna join me for a swim?” Her eyes are playful. There’s a smile on her lips that dares me to say no. And even if I wanted to resist,the answer’s already locked in my throat.
“Yep.” I follow her outside, trying to act like I’m cool, like this isn’t undoing me.
20
I’m not staring, you’re staring
I slowly unpacked my things into my new room, piece by piece, like I was reclaiming a part of myself. Folded clothes went into the drawers. My favourite skirts, dresses, and jackets got hung neatly in the wardrobe. My toiletries lined up on the bathroom shelf, simple and familiar. None of this feels permanent yet, but it’s mine.
This is home.For now.
I sat on the middle of the bed with Gizmo curled beside me, her little head rested on my thigh. I stroked her fur slowly, grounding myself in her soft, steady presence.
My chest rose and fell with deep breaths, I let them come and go, slow and intentional.
My mind running over the day.
Was that horrible? Yes.
It didn’t go great, but am I suprised? No.
Did I survive it? Yes.
It’s done now. I am safe.
I just want to be happy. I want normalcy.
I don’t want to think about how horrible the first half of today was anymore. I want to focus on the positives. Iwantto move forward from this.
