So, I do what I do best. The exact thing he’s asking menotto do. I give my body over to him, effortlessly, and keep my heart locked behind the walls that guard it.
I’m such a fucking winner.
Chapter forty-five
Maverick
March 2025
Standing here, our naked bodies pressed against one another, I contemplate leaning in to kiss her like I’m craving to, but the fear of another rejection overwhelms me. She won’t let me kiss her anymore. Almost a fucking year without her mouth truly on mine.
Because of that, I laid it all out for her, making it as clear as possible that I’m doing all I can to make this work and thatsheis what I want. Yet, I still don’t feel as if I got through to her.
So, without words, I silently challenge her a little more. Leaning down, I dip my hand in the first tray of paint and hold it up to show her.
“Yellow,” I say, inching my hand closer toward her.
“Are you seriously going to put—” I cut her words off with my action as I softly let my hand rest on her shoulder and drag the color down her arm.
Eyes wide in surprise and body slightly tensing, she pulls back a bit, her eyes searching for mine. “Oh fuck, it’s cold,” she says on a small yelp.
“Yellow, for the friendship we’ve managed to build.” I smile as the words leave my mouth. “You’ve become my best friend. The person I run to when shit gets hard and life is too heavy. Having you in my life is like always having a safe place to land.”
A soft smile tugs at her mouth, and I continue, dipping my hand in another tray of paint beside us.
“Orange,” I say, placing my hand on her cheek, slowly trailing the paint across her face and down her neck. “For the life and joy you bring to the world simply by existing in it.”
Our eyes still connected, she lets out a soft moan as my hand travels further down, cupping her breast and flicking her nipple softly. I watch as her breath becomes heavy, and need floods her eyes. The moment isn’t just sexual—it’s tender and sensual. It’s every ounce of what I feel for her coming to the surface.
Watching how her body reacts to my words sets off a fire in my heart, and my breathing begins to match hers, the need to have her filling me, making it impossible to ignore.
I make quick work of rinsing my hands off, drying them, and dipping them both in separate colors before stepping back up to her.
“Green—”
“Mav,” she says, cutting me off, voice breathy and pleading. “Enough with the paint and colors. I need you inside of me.”
I nod, understanding what she wants, but I won’t give it to her. Not yet.
I place my hand on her stomach, letting the paint sit there for a second before speaking, “For the confidence you exude. The way you hold yourself and present yourself with such strength and courage. It’s beautiful.” I continue trailing my hand downward, making sure to stop right before I reach her center. Her heavybreaths turn into panting as she clutches onto my shoulders, thrusting her hips forward, begging for me to go lower. I don’t.
“Ugh,” she groans in frustration, her head slightly falling back as I remove my hand.
“Pink. For the love you give so freely.” Placing my hand on her right breast, I massage it firmly, letting it trail upward before stopping over her heart. She looks at me.Truly sees me. And I can see the love for me there in her eyes. “You struggle to receive love in return. But you, Izabel Landry, love fiercely. Your heart may be guarded in the shelter you’ve locked it behind, but it’s as pure as they come. And I want it. I want all of your heart. I want all of you.”
As soon as the last word leaves my mouth, her hands are on my shoulders, pulling my body down onto the canvas with her. She climbs on top of me, straddling me as she leans in close. For a moment, I think she’s going to lean in and kiss me. She hesitates, as if contemplating it.
She doesn’t.
No kiss follows. She pulls back slightly, as if thinking better of it, and reaches between us, grabbing ahold of my cock in her hand, stroking it softly and slowly between our bodies.
I want her mouth on mine. I want to feel that intimate connection with her. It frustrates me that she’s withholding it from me again, and I don’t know why.Baby steps. We’ll get back there.
Disappointment races through me, but I push it down and decide to be present in this moment with her.
I love this woman, with every piece of me, heart and soul. And if this is how I show her that, through sex, then that’s what I’ll do.
After a few moments, she surprises me by releasing my cock from her grasp, leaning over, and dipping her hand in one of the paint trays.
