Grabbing my hand, he leads me down another path that aims toward the water. I follow without putting up a fight.
He seems nervous. Jett isnevernervous. He's typically so confident that it's downright fucking cocky. It's one of the things I like most about him. He's self-aware, knows who he is, and doesn't give a shit about impressing anyone. You either take him for exactly who he is, or you can eat shit and leave. We’re a lot alike in that manner, and I think that's why I appreciate it so much in him. So, to see him nervous like this just doesn't sit right with me.
"Okay, Jett. What is going on? You're nervous. You're never fucking nervous," I blurt, pulling my hand from his, and stop walking behind him.
"When I missed your birthday last year, I told you I wanted to make it up to you. This is my way of doing that. You love butterflies; I grew these flowers so they’d come for you." He doesn't look at me as he speaks. He just keeps walking, expecting me to follow behind him.
I don't.
Instead, like the total asshole I am, I turn around and begin walking back toward the horses,Because he’s Jett,no longer a good enough excuse to stay.
"What the fuck, Iz?" Jett shouts from behind me, the anger in his tone evident. I can hear him walking behind me, so I spin to face him.
"You have nothing to make up to me, Jett!" I scream, and he takes a step back. "We. Are. Not. Together. You know that! Why are you trying to ruin this?" I say each word clearly and slowly, my hands moving dramatically as I speak.
Jett winces, and his shoulders visibly slump. I wasn't expecting my instant regret, witnessing each word pierce through him like a blade to the heart.
Shit.
Seeing the disappointment clearly cross his features, I can’t help but hate that I’m like this. I’d love to be able to pull back the layers of armor I’ve built around my heart and let him in fully. But I can’t do that. I did it once before, for Chad.
I know Jett well enough to knowhe is not Chad.Not even close. But, if there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that men take, and I’m not willing to give any man the opportunity to take more from me than what I’m willing to give, ever again.
"You're right, Iz. We're not together.” His jaw flexes, and he rolls his eyes. “You'll fuck me, but God forbid you won't give me more. So no, we're not together. Because you're too goddamn stubborn to see a good thing even when it's standing right in front of your fucking face." Jett's tone is harsh, and his words hit me exactly as intended. He steps toward me, our bodies colliding as our eyes meet, and his hands cup my face. "And believe me, Iz, we are a good thing. Don't fuck this up." It comes out as more of a plea than a warning.
I pull back, refusing to do this with him. Why is he doing this? Things between us are great. I thought we were on the same page, and now he wants to go and get all in his feelings and shit.
Chad…
My stomach churns on reflex, the thought of his name repulses me.I let him in,and he took advantage of that, leaving me damaged and in shambles.
What the fuck…
"I'm gonna go." My tone is dry, lacking all the emotion I'm bottling up.
I want to love this.I want to love him. I can't risk it.
I just can't.
I jog back toward the horses. Jett doesn't try to stop me. Shakily, I manage to get up on Harry Trotter without breaking any bones.
Once I'm up and settled, we head back towards the ranch and don't look back.
Chapter four
Jett
November 2016
Standing there with a raised brow and wide eyes, watching as she disappears, I feel confused and conflicted. She refuses to give me more than surface level, and it’s infuriating. I know she wants this. It’s obvious.
Yet, she lets her fears win.
She tries to put on a brave facade, but it’s all for show. She’s terrified.
I begged her to give us a shot, not fuck this up, and she simply left. I could be butt hurt and take that as a sign to just give up, but I won’t. She deserves someone who loves her enough to stick around. Someone who is willing to wait for her.
I can be that someone. Iwillbe that someone. I’m a patient man, and I’ll be there when she’s ready...
