I laugh a little. “Yep. Two weekends ago.”
“This is an incredible ring.”
“It’s fake,” I blurt. I haven’t told anyone else, but for some reason, I feel this compulsive urge to tell her the truth.
Her eyes flick up to mine in surprise, but she doesn’t say anything. She looks back down at the ring, moving my hand around so she can see it from different angles. “Well, I’d never know the difference.” She looks up at my face. “How did he do it?”
I drag my hand away. “At a baseball game.”
“On TV?”
I nod.
“Wow.”
“Yeah.” I laugh lightly. “I couldn’t have said no even if I wanted to.”
Shawna tilts her head, brows raised.
What in the world? Why did I just say that?
“Oh, I didn’t mean that I wanted to say no!” I wave my hand around. “Just being silly. You know what I mean.”
“Mmm,” she muses. “I don’t know. When Joshua proposed, there wasn’t ever a thought of saying no. Not then, and not after.”
Panic sets in. “I swear. I want to marry Zach. We’re good.” I nod, a little overeagerly. I feel as if I look like a robot who’s pretending to be human and fooling no one.
Must. Save. Conversation.
“Anyway! It was sooo great to see you!” I turn to leave her cubicle, then spin back to face her. “Actually, did you need help with anything? I can carry things to your car?”
Please say no. Please say no.
“I’m good,” she says.
Phew.
She studies me for a moment. “It was good to see you, Claire,” she says. “And feel free to call me any time you need to talk. I’m not really doing much these days. Just waiting for the baby.”
“Sounds good.” I hit her with a double thumbs-up, then feel like an idiot as I walk back to my cubicle.
What was all of that? Why did I bring up the possibility of saying no to Zach? I wouldnever.We’ve been together for ten years. If I were going to break up with him, I would have done it by now, right?
Besides, our lives have been mapped out for us since we were kids. Zach and I were basically betrothed, and I was going to become a math professor, just like my parents—and look how well that part has turned out! I truly love my job. Teaching fills a piece of my soul, and there’s nothing quite as beautiful as math. Finding solutions to problems is so satisfying.
I’m happy. I’m excited. Everything is good. This is all the way it should be, and I’m so thankful for it.
Yeah.
That’s it.
“So,I’m thinking we could run the center every day from ten till two,” I say to Ryan later that afternoon at our first planning session for the tutoring center. So far, we’ve made a list of potential rooms, and I’m going to work on nailing it down. Then Ryan agreed to send out a few emails to locate spare computers. Now we’re on to logistics.
He’s been a little distant, which hurts my heart, but as we keep talking, he’s opening up a little more.
He raises a brow. “Do you really think anyone will show up on a Friday? We don’t have any math classes offered on Fridays.”
“I’m sure there will be some super diligent students who will want to attend.”
