Ordinarily, I wouldn’t care.Live and let live.It was his life.But now this was personal.Now it mattered, because I’d dropped a shitload of money to be here and arrived to discover that the so-called love gurus had decided that a playboy was my perfect match.
What a joke.
‘As tempting as that sounds, I’d rather lick a pig’s arse,’ I said firmly.
‘If that’s what you’re into, I’m sure that could be arranged.’ He flashed a cheeky smile.
God.Why did he have to have a nice smile?All perfect white teeth and soft-looking full lips.
Arsehole.
‘Obviously I’m not into that, I was just… Never mind.The point is,no, I don’t want to take a selfie.’
‘What?’ He frowned like I’d just sprouted five heads.
‘Listen, I know you’re probably used to people begging to take photos with you and I’m sorry to bruise your ego, but I’m not interested.’
His jaw dropped so hard he was lucky it didn’t shatter on the table.
‘But I’ll tag you.I can even invite you to be a…’ He paused like he was searching for the word.‘Collaborator! So when I post, I can invite you and when you accept it’ll show up on your feed thing too.’
‘I’m not on social media,’ I said flatly.‘So I have no interest incollaboratingor having any photos with you showing up on myfeed thing.’
‘Wait.Youdon’twant to take a selfie and you’renoton social media?’
‘That’s exactly what I said.You’re slowly starting to get the hang of this listening thing, well done!’ I deadpanned.
Jake sat there in silence, his face contorting in a million different directions.
‘So why did you come here?’ he asked.
My eyeballs trebled in size as I tried to take in the ridiculousness of his question.
‘You’re seriously asking me what made me pay a fortune to come to a place called the Love Hotel?Er, this is probably going to blow your mind, but I came here to… newsflash… findlove.’
‘Good one!’ Jake chuckled.‘Delivered like a true pro.’ He nodded his approval, whilst I crossed my arms across my chest as my expression turned to stone.The silence stretched for several beats before what I’d just said finally started to penetrate his tiny brain.‘Wait.You’re beingserious?’
‘Of course I’m being serious!’ I snapped.
‘Shit,’ he muttered.‘So… you’re not… what do you do for work?’
‘I work in a juice bar.In New York.’
‘But are you an aspiring singer?’
‘No.’
‘Actress?’
‘No.’
‘Just to be clear, you’renotworking in a juice bar whilst you do auditions or wait for your big break?’
‘No!’
Well, that might not be entirely true.I’d always wanted to make a proper go of becoming a freelance nail technician, but I didn’t think that was the kind of ‘big break’ he was referring to.
My mind drifted as I thought about how amazing it’d be if I could follow that dream, but then I dismissed it.There was no point.That was never gonna happen.
