I get to my knees, leaning back, grinning as she looks up at me, her pupils blown from lust. “That—that was…” she laughs, covering her eyes with her forearm. “Oh my god, I can’t believe we just did that!”
I watch her, as I’ve done so many times, but I’ve never seen her as carefree—happy—as she is right now. I’d give anything to see that look on her face every day for the rest of my life.
“Can I see you?” she asks, sitting up, leaning over and wrapping her arms around her knees to inspect my jeans.
My cock is straining against the zipper, so fucking hard for her I’d be surprised if there’s not a permanent pattern in my skin.
Her eyes never leave me as I stand, slowly dragging the zipper down before pulling them down my legs along with my boxers, drawing out our torture despite my desperation to be skin to skin with the woman of my dreams. The heat in her gaze is intoxicating, calling me back down to her. I kick my clothes away, falling back to the blanket and trapping her beneath my body.
Her legs open, cradling me between her thighs, holding me to her as she pulls me down for another kiss. The head of my cock brushes her wet folds, sliding between them easily, nudging her clit.
“Condom,” I murmur against her lips, pulling back, ready to find my jeans and the condom I always carry in my wallet.
“I’m on the pill,” she says, pulling me back to her.
My indecision makes me hesitate briefly. I can’t afford to mess up—my life is too dangerous for a wife, let alone a child.
“Lachlan,” she moans, thrusting up into me as her lips ravage mine.
Unable to deny myself her sweet, innocent heat any longer, I move into position.
“This is going to hurt for just a minute, baby,” I say, capturing her lips with mine.
Sinking the first inch into Delaney’s tight, wet heat is heaven—possessing her is the only thing I’ve dreamt about for the past year. Now that it’s finally happening, I’m afraid that I’m not going to last long.
I deepen the kiss, stilling my movements, letting her get accustomed to my size, and praying it gives me a minute to compose myself. She’s not my first, but she’s the first one that counts as far as I’m concerned—the first one who matters.
Pulling back, I look down into her dark-brown eyes, getting lost in the love I see there, because that’s what it is—love—and I know I’m in trouble. A tear escapes from the corner, running down her delicate cheek and I lean forward, licking it.
“I’m gonna move now, okay, sweetheart?”
She nods, moving her hips slightly to adjust the angle.
“If you need me to stop…shit,” I mutter, hoping it doesn’t come to that, because I don’t know if I’ll be able to once I’m moving inside her. “If you need me to stop, I’ll stop.” She nods again. “I need the words, Delaney.” My own words sound like a grimace, the torture taking all of my concentration.
“Yes, Lachlan. I need you. Now.Please.” She’s practically begging now, and my woman will never have to beg me for anything. Not tonight.
I withdraw until just the tip is inside her, punching my hips forward quickly and plunging inside her to the hilt. She gasps, biting my lip, her limbs tightening around me, but she doesn’t cry out. I withdraw again, moving shallowly, teaching her the rhythm, deepening my thrusts little by little until she’s screaming my name, arching her back and driving her hips up to meet me.
I’ve managed to keep myself from falling over the edge only by reciting the names of saints I can remember from primary school and reminding myself that it’s her first time and I’d rather die than not make it good for her.
I feel her pussy fluttering around my shaft, squeezing me tightly until I can’t breathe. “Fuck, baby, I’m so fucking close,” I groan, kissing her again, unable to deny myself the pleasure of her tongue.
“Fuck me, Lachlan,” she moans, tightening her arms around my neck, keeping me close. “I need to come.” The knowledge that my girl needs something from me is all it takes for me to thrust harder, putting all my weight on one forearm to snake the other hand between our bodies, rubbing her clit furiously, catapulting us both over the edge.
My cock pulses, releasing my pent-up seed deep inside her. A small part of me wishes she wasn’t on the pill—that my child could already be growing inside her as she walks across the stage tomorrow. I quickly dismiss the fantasy, knowing if anything happens to her because of me, I’ll never forgive myself.
We lie like that—a tangled pile of limbs—panting and enjoying the afterglow until the night breeze turns cool and she begins to shiver in my arms. I clean her up as best I can, before kissing her goodnight and walking her to her back door.
“Stay with me?” she asks shyly, looking up at me from under her thick lashes.
“I would love to, baby, but I have to get back. I’ve been gone too long already,” I say, taking her in my arms and pulling her against my body, needing to feel her for just another moment. Kissing her briefly—afraid I’ll get carried away and take her up on her offer and never leave—I force myself to step back, letting the cool air wash over me, restoring my common sense.
I walk away, feeling her eyes tracking my every movement as I make it to my car. I relive the best night of my life as I drive away, bitter at the way things have to be. If it wasn’t for certain circumstances beyond my control—namelymy family—Delaney Hawthorne would be mine. Forever.
As I lie in bed, fighting sleep, I wonder if it’d be worth it to give it all up—for her. Could I walk away from the only home I’ve ever known? The people who love me unconditionally, but whose very love endangers the future I crave?
It may make me a monster, doing what I did, knowing that we could only ever have tonight, but I’d do it again in a heartbeat—damning myself to hell—for one more night in her arms.
