Livvy sighed. “What is there to talk about? He’s marrying Rhonda Powers. Our relationship was a publicity stunt. Why should I care?”
Judy crossed her arms and harrumphed. “But you do care. I know you do.”
“No, Judy, I don’t. You’re the only person I care about.”
“Damn it, Livvy, that’s my point. I was so happy for you when it seemed like things with Flynn were going well. I know you told me over and over it was all for show, but I could tell you genuinely liked him. Maybe more. Can you honestly say you didn’t have feelings for him?”
Livvy bit her lip. She wanted to vehemently protest, but she couldn’t lie to Judy. “Maybe I did. A little. But I got carried away by the charade. That’s all.” She threw the magazine on the counter and went to take Judy in her arms. “I promise it will never happen again.”
Her sister strained against her embrace. “That’s exactly what I was afraid you’d say.” Livvy was horrified to see tears welling in her sister’s eyes. “Haven’t you denied your happiness for my sake long enough?”
Livvy dodged the question, pretending that she’d never done any such thing. “I’ve never—”
Judy swiped furiously at her eyes. “Ever since the accident, you’ve put me first. You’ve been there for every appointment, every rehab session. You made sure nothing would stop me from dancing again.”
“If you don’t want to dance anymore, you don’t have to. We can leave Hollywood tomorrow. Or next week, after I wrap the picture. We don’t have to stay here. My career doesn’t matter.”
Judy held up her hand. “Stop! Do you even hear yourself? ‘My career doesn’t matter.’ How could you possibly think that’s what I want for you? You’ve already given up so much for me—college, your dreams of being a writer.” Livvy tried to protest, but Judy wouldn’t let her. “No, don’t pretend like you don’t know what I’m talking about. You haven’t picked up a pen since I came home from the hospital. And the worst part is, I let you give it all up. Because I was too weak then to argue with you about it. That’s something I’ll regret for the rest of my life. But when that actress left and they bumped you up from an understudy at the Hollywood Bowl, I hoped that this was the universe’s way of giving you a second chance. Of helping you find a new way to tell the stories that you so loved. Acting might not have been your dream, but these last few months, I thought that maybe you’d changed your mind. That you’d found something in it that made you come alive again. Made you happy.”
Livvy scrunched up her face in some twisted mix of guilt and pain. Judy was right. She had been happy. Somehow, becoming Liv de Lesseps had changed her life for the better. She was still a storyteller, just like she’d always dreamed she would be. And she loved it. To give it up now, after she’d already lost Flynn, would be crushing. But not as devastating as what Judy had been through. Still, she couldn’t lie to her sister. “Fine. I’ve fallen in love with acting. Is that what you want me to say? That becoming someone else on-screen, putting myself in the service of someone else’s story, is more rewarding than I ever dreamed it could be. That I should be thanking you every day for making me take that understudy job.”
“I knew it!” Judy interrupted. “You can’t just give that up, Livvy. To do what? Move back to Saratoga? There’s nothing there for us. We didn’t just come here for me. You’re a talented actress, and I can see how fulfilled your work makes you. If you decide you truly don’t want to act anymore, you don’t have to. You can still be a writer, Livvy! Like you told me when you gave up your spot at college, to be a writer all you have to do is write. So, pick up your pen and do it. I’ll work to support us both. But we’re not leaving with our tails between our legs. The last thing I would want is for you to give it up for me, out of some misguided belief that it will keep me safe. How much have you already sacrificed for me? I’m grateful, Livvy. Don’t think I’m not. But it’s been four years. You get to live your own life.”
Livvy frowned and walked to the doorway that divided their tiny kitchenette from their so-called living room. She leaned against the wall, her back to Judy. “No, I don’t. I tried, Judy. I really did. But I flew too close to the sun. I decided to do what I wanted for once, not what I knew I was supposed to do. And it brought disaster to our door. You got hurt. Maybe I couldn’t have prevented it, but I could’ve been there for you when it happened. That made me realize that I should’ve stuck to the deal I made with God the night of the accident. Sitting at your bedside, praying you’d pull through, I promised him a life for a life. But I broke that promise, and you’re the one who paid the price. I won’t break it again.”
Judy startled her by coming up behind her, wrapping her arms around her stomach, and resting her head on her shoulder. “Don’t you see that’s the opposite of what I want? We both survived. There’s no trade to be made here. You fought for me when I didn’t think I had the strength to fight for myself. But that’s done now. Our reward is that we both get to live.”
Livvy leaned back into her sister’s embrace, pondering her words and how much they sounded like what Flynn had tried to tell her that horrible day they’d bailed Judy out. Now, she was holding back tears. “But if I’d been here at the bungalow that night—”
“Nothing would have happened differently. They still would have hauled me off to jail at Devlin’s orders. Except you would have panicked and possibly done something hasty you’d come to regret. This way, you had Flynn to help you think straight. If he hadn’t been with you, hadn’t jumped in to pay my bail, what would you have done?”
Livvy balled her hands into a fist. “I would have made them let you out.”
Judy scoffed. “You see? That’s exactly what I mean. Then we both would’ve ended up in a jail cell, and what good would that have done?”
Judy let go of her and grabbed her hand, leading Livvy to the couch and wrapping her arm around her shoulder. Livvy couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt cared for like this. Like someone else was willing to shoulder the burden with her. She was beginning to realize it was because she hadn’t let anyone.
She gripped Judy’s hand so hard that her knuckles turned white. “You know that all I’ve ever wanted is to make sure nothing horrible ever happened to you again.”
Judy nodded, and her throat was choked with emotion as she began to speak. “Of course I know that. But you can’t keep me safe forever. Neither of us would truly be living. Bad things happen, and there’s nothing either of us can do to prevent them. Can’t it be enough to know that you’ve taught me to protect myself as best as I can?”
Livvy closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. “I want it to be. But it’s hard.”
Judy hugged her tight. “I know. Things that night could’ve been so much worse. But I protected myself. I fought back. Because that’s what you taught me to do.”
Livvy snorted through her tears, pride flaring in her chest. “You did take a chunk out of that man’s face, didn’t you?”
Judy grabbed her shoulders and pushed Livvy back, studying her closely. Tears swam in her eyes. “I did.” She released a watery giggle. “You should’ve seen the look on his face. He was shocked that a girl would do such a thing.”
Livvy barked out a laugh. “I’ll bet he was. Last time he’ll mess with a Blount sister. Serves him right.” Her tears turned into an uncontrollable fit of snot-filled giggles, and she struggled to regain composure. Judy laughed along with her until they both collapsed on the couch.
“What a fine mess I’ve made for us both.” Livvy gasped, clutching her stomach with one hand and swiping at her eyes with the other.
Judy got serious then. “No, Livvy. No mess. You’ve done the best you could, and it’s more than I could ever have asked for. Everyone should be so lucky to have a sister as wonderful as you. But what I want more than anything is just that—for you to be my sister. Not my caretaker, not my mother, not my protector—my sister.”
Livvy swallowed and gave Judy a weak smile. “You know, Flynn said the same thing.”
“He did?”
