“Mr. Quinn has come and gone.” I started crying then. “He came to break up with me tonight. It only took him like five minutes.”
“What? Why?”
I scoffed, because I wished I knew. “Because he’s going to tell the board they should cut the funding for the foundation. He came over, could barely look at me, told me we had to break up, and left. That was the extent of it.”
“I’m coming over. I’ll tell Salome too.”
“You don’t have to.”
He sucked his teeth, and I could practically see his eyes rolling. “Stop it. Of course I have to. I have no idea what got into him, but we’re going to figure this out, babe.”
“Okay.” I sounded small and pathetic. “Thank you.”
“I’ll see you in thirty, ma.”
I ended the call with José and sat there with my eyes closed replaying the scene with Rocco. I tried not to psychoanalyze him. He wasn’t my client. He wasn’t my project. He’d been my boyfriend...and now he wasn’t.
Rocco
I walked into the Sturm’s corporate office in a fog, my body aching from lack of sleep and what I’d done to Julia last night. I knew I had to. I didn’t think it would hurt so much though. I didn’t know anything could hurt like this.
As I turned on the lights in my office, the brightness made my eyes ache. I’d gotten home from Julia’s and sat on my couch until Pulga started meowing at me in disdain. It was almost like she knew what I’d done and was pissed at me for not consulting her first. I lay in bed awake until 2:00 a.m., but couldn’t sleep, so I worked on my presentation. The presentation that had been bought and paid for by Duke Sturm, so he could turn away from his family’s legacy and reduce his company to a machine with the sole purpose of making money. I had the numbers, and Sturm’swouldbe leaner if they made those cuts that Phil and Duke kept advocating for. They’d be more appealing for savvy investors if they were less generous with their employee benefits. It was true no other high-end retailers offered sixteen weeks of paternity leave, or helped people who had kids with special needs, but it’s what made Sturm’s staff so dedicated. They loved their company and were loyal because Sturm’s was good to them. All of that would be lost.
I didn’t check my phone and I didn’t check my email. I just sat and reviewed what I’d decided on for my recommendation. I didn’t need to know what my boss had to tell me, I knew what he wanted me to do. Just as I was looking at the last few slides, with my stomach in knots, my phone started buzzing and I quickly picked up when I saw it was Sofia.
“Is everything okay?” I knew I sounded strung out, and there was no helping that.
But when Sofia spoke she sounded a lot better than she did last night. “Hey, just wanted to tell you that the CPS workers already came by. They were here at 7:00 a.m. sharp. But we were ready for them.” I could tell the visit had gone well, but I could barely muster up anything more than a grunt. “They loved how clean everything was and that Blue had her own space. You know how she is, she was showing them all her toys and she had on her cowboys boots.”
“That’s good, hon.” I sounded like death. “I’m glad. Whenever they call me, you know I’ll have a lot to say about how great of a mom you are. Once I’m back in New York I’ll—”
I literally gasped for air at the thought of never seeing Julia again. Or worse, being the cause for Julia being back in New York herself, hating me. Because that’s what would happen after today and maybe it already had: she would fucking hate me.
“Rocco, what’s wrong?”
The lightness in Sofia’s voice was completely gone now, her focus on me. “Nothing, sis. I’m fine.” I didn’t sound fine, and she obviously could tell.
“Did something happen with you and Julia?”
“I have to go, Sofia, but don’t worry. This promotion is happening, no matter what. We’re getting that place in Westchester.”
“What are you going to do?” The tinge of panic in her voice, the worry for me, gnawed at me, but I could not deviate from this plan.
“I’m giving my recommendation to the board today. I’m going to tell them they should consider cutting funding for the foundation.”
I heard my sister suck in a breath. “Is that what you think they should do?”
“It’s what I need to do. Sofia, we got to get out of New York.”
“So you’re going to risk Julia losing her job and hating you, so you can move me and Blue out of the city? No. You can’t do that.”
I gripped my phone hard, wishing she would just let this go. Let me fucking do this. “No. I am doing what I was sent here to do.”
“Is that what you think they should do? Cut those programs?”
I ran a shaky hand over my head, feeling desperate and so fucking alone. “It’s not about what I want. Who cares what I think? This is the way it needs to be.”
“No, it’s the way you think you need to do it, so you can get that promotion.” She scoffed, and I could hear the stubborn set in her voice. “You’re not doing it. You’re not risking your relationship and your conscience over this. We’ll be fine. We can find a cheaper place to live. Blue and I will go wherever. We’ll go to Texas.” She laughed nervously, but once that little glimmer of hope sparkled in my chest, it wound not go out.
