We get out onto the courts. Do our warmups. Everyone is super focused and Coach keeps reminding us about regionals. How important they are. What an incredible opportunity it is to be seen by pro coaches and trainers. People who can help us break into the ATP. I let this go over my head. I’ll never break into the ATP, but I do want to take us to regionals and make our coaches proud.
After practice, I make a beeline for Ben and ask him to study with me at the library. I need to get him alone and find out what’s wrong. If it’s Priestley, I’m going to have to put my big boy pants on and talk to him as his VP, tell him that bullying is not acceptable. That his leadership style doesn’t work with everyone. It’ll be good practice for the real world—as Bryce keeps reminding me. When I’ll have to deal with all kinds of personalities.
We find a table in a reasonably quiet spot in the library and Ben starts taking his books out of his bag.
“Hey, Ben, can I ask you something?”
He looks up, his eyes all big and worried. Ben has such a babyface, it’s easy to forget he’s my age and can probably take care of himself. Something about him justbrings out that protective instinct in me. One I’ve never actually been much good with, seeing as there was always someone to look out for me—like my mom, or Evan’s parents, or Bryce, or Evan himself.
“Is everything okay with you? You seem … a little down. Did Priestley do something when I was out last night?”
He frowns, looking confused. Either I’m completely off-base or he’s a really good actor. I don’t think it’s the latter. He flushes before looking down and making a big fuss getting his laptop out of his backpack.
“Ben, what is it?”
He drags his teeth over his bottom lip and my stomach does summersaults as I wait for him to tell me what’s wrong.
“Were you out with that guy last night?”
Okay, I wasn’t expecting that. Is he mad about me seeing Evan?
“Yeah, why?”
He swallows, looks down, shakes his head. “Nothing, it doesn’t matter.”
He takes his laptop out and opens it on the desk.
“Ben, do you have a problem with me being bi?”
“What? No, of course not.” His face heats up.
“Tell me, what is it? I’m not letting it drop until you tell me.”
“It’s just … I wish you would have told me earlier, about being bi.”
I frown. “What difference does it make? I wasn’t even sure I was … ” my stomach drops. “Why? Would you have not been my friend if you’d known I’m not straight?”
“What?” His voice comes out strangled. “Of course not, I’m not a homophobe, Nate. Jesus.”
Now I flush. “So what then?”
He takes a deep breath. “It’s because … it might have been easier to talk to you about … well … I’m, I think … No, I know I’m gay.”
I blink. Am I really so clueless and self-involved that I missed the fact that two of my best friends are gay?
“Say something.”
“I … well obviously it’s fine. I mean, I support you.” I run a hand over my face. “I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t tell me.”
“I … I didn’t think you were a bigot or anything, I just … needed to figure some things out myself first.”
“So have you been with a guy?”
He shakes his head. “I haven’t been with anyone.”
I try not to react to that the way my instincts want me to. Ben has a babyface, but he’s still adorable. I would have expected him to at least have experience with a girl or two. I’ve definitely seen girls flirting with him at parties. I just thought he was shy. Now it all makes sense.
“Do you want to?”
