Page 54 of Nobody's Girl

“We’re married. Heavy is what we do.”

She grinned at him. “Will I ever get used to that I’m a wife now?”

“I hope so. Especially when we have kids.” He kissed her playfully, but then his smile faded when he saw the hesitation in her eyes. “Sof?”

“Ivo…I’m not sure about…” she sighed and sat up. “We should have talked about this before we got married. I’m not sure I want kids.”

The shock in his eyes made her heart hurt. He sat up too, rubbing his face. “I guess…I just assumed. What’s your concern?”

“That I’ll be a shitty mother. That I’ll never be able to give my kids any proper guidance, that my trust issues will fuck them up. I wish I knew what it was in my past, since before my mom married Fergus, what it was that left me so damaged. But I guess I’ll never know now. In any case, it just feels selfish of me, however much I want to bear your child, Ivo. What if there’s some deep-seated wrongness in me?”

Ivo was staring at her in confusion. “Where the hell did all this come from? You never mentioned…Sofia, what on earth makes you think you’re so damaged you can’t give a child the love it needs?”

“The more pressing question is, and please, be honest with me, is, Ivo, do you want children? I know you will already have a daughter any day now, but could you live with your wife not giving you a child someday?”

Sofia really didn’t want to ask that question answered but Ivo sighed. “At the end of the day, baby, I want you. We can work everything else out.”

She reached out to him but he pulled away, got off the bed. “I have to pee.”

Sofia felt tearful. How had this incredible day gone from heavenly to this? And why the fuck hadn’t they discussed the kid issue before they got married? Yet another mistake. Would they ever stop making them?

Ivo returned from the bathroom and got back into bed. He pulled her into his arms and she snuggled into him. “We’ll figure all this out,” he said, kissing her forehead. “Don’t worry about it tonight.”

In a few moments, his breathing became regular and Sofia knew he had fallen asleep. She stroked his face, tracing the scar near his eye, the small constellation of freckles on his cheek which looked like The Big Dipper. The sensual outline of his mouth. God, how I love you, Ivo Zacca. She kissed his eyelids, the long, thick dark lashes resting on his cheeks. She could imagine his son, all dark curls and huge green eyes and her heart ached. But she had meant everything she had said to him. There was something inside her that screamed at her to not bring a child into the world. She wondered if something had happened to her when she was young, something that she blocked out but her mother would never talk about the years when Sofia was a toddler. She never mentioned Sofia’s father…ever. Sofia didn’t know anything about him except that he was American, and now her mother was gone…

Suddenly an idea struck her and for a few moments, Sofia argued with herself over than idea. Finally, silently, she slid from the bed and padded quietly into the suite’s living room. She snagged her phone from her purse and looked at the time. It would be late evening in New York. Steeling herself, she dialed the number and waited to speak to someone she thought she would never talk to again. When he answered, his warm voice brought tears to her eyes.

“Jonas? It’s me. It’s Sofia.”

Chapter Twenty-Six

By the Friday, Ivo had brokered the deal for their new apartment in the Marias and when he stopped by Desiree’s gallery to tell Sofia the news, she was over-the moon.”

“It’s ours, baby.”

She looked up from the stack of paperwork she was filing and grinned. “Really?”

“Really. Now, how shall we celebrate?”

Ivo crushed his lips to hers then, kissing her until she was breathless. “I know exactly how I want to celebrate.”

Sofia grinned. “Want to play at some games tonight? We could go back to that club.”

Ivo grinned. “Shall we glass-box it, or there are private rooms where we could play with any number of toys?”

Sofia felt her pulse quicken. “Oh, yes, a private room…and maybe tonight, we could…invite Penn. If you want to, I’ll leave it up to you.” She added hurriedly but Ivo nodded.

“Why not?” He nuzzled her neck. “In this scenario, watching another man fuck you is making me harder than diamond. Feel,” he whispered and she slid her hand onto his crotch. His cock was ram-rod hard and, casting a quick look around the empty gallery, Sofia bent down and unzipped Ivo’s pants, freeing his cock and sweeping her mouth over the wide crest of it. She heard Ivo’s sharp intake of breath as she began to tease the tip of his shaft with her tongue, flicking and lashing around the head, then tracing the veins up the side, the silky skin tasting of salt and pre-cum.

“Christ Sofia,” Ivo whispered, his breathing labored, “You’re going to get fucked so hard tonight.”

Her mouth curved up in a smile, but then she hollowed out her cheeks, swallowing him down as he came, trying to be discreet but almost exploding into her mouth. Recovering, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her until her head swam. “Tonight’s going to be amazing, beautiful. I’ll call Penn.”

Sofia nuzzled his neck. “Do that.”