Page 269 of Nobody's Girl

That girl isn’t going to let Kyle come out here without her!

“We’ve been up here for hours,” Alyssa says as she pulls out of my arms. “I shudder to think what our parents are thinking about us right now.”

She strides toward the bedroom door and I catch up, slipping my arm around her tiny waist. My laugh is a bit on the evil side as I whisper in her ear, “Probably something terrible, like we’re up here making babies.”

She stops and bats at my chest with her small hand. “Don’t even joke about that, Eden. I forgot to pray before you devoured me while ago.”

“What? You usually pray before we, umm …” I say.

Her voice an octave higher than normal interrupts me, “Of course I do. It’s our only form of contraception. I hope Our Creator will accept an after prayer as opposed to my normal before prayer.”

I laugh and give her a little squeeze. “Princess, we have no control over that. You’ll just have to accept what happens. A baby wouldn’t be a bad thing.”

“We’ve been married just over a month, Eden. Let’s be us for a while before we have to be parents. I mean, damn, we’ve had a lot of transitions. First we get married, then we become giant birds. Adding being pregnant then having a baby to care for, well it’s just too much. I can’t handle anymore right now.”

I kiss her cheek as we trot down the stairs. “I love you, princess.”

“I love you too, my prince. If you care about my feelings, perhaps you could join me in asking Our Creator to give us more time before he bestows a gift upon us.”

I nod and smile, but hide my true feelings from her.

It’s not in our hands after all.

CHAPTER 45

ALYSSA

We go downstairs to find no one in the house, so we wander around until we see our parents out a door off the kitchen. “Look, Eden, they have a swimming pool.”

Eden opens the door. “I see that. Let’s join them.”

Lyle, saunters towards us, and says, “There they are. I was wondering if you were ever going to come join us.”

“We were tired from all the drama, Papa,” Eden says with a smile.

Lyle gives Eden the same devilish look Eden gets sometimes. “Tired? So that’s what they’re calling it now days?” he asks, then turns his attention to me. “Make it a baby girl, Alyssa. I want a sweet little girl to spoil.” My face turns beet red and my head drops like a rock. Lyle’s arm wraps around my shoulders, hugging me to him. “Oh, how I love to see her blush.”

I hit at him faintly. “You’re terrible, Papa,” I reprimand him, as my whole family laughs.

Eden comes to my rescue. “Papa, leave my wife alone,” he tells Lyle and then the rescue effort takes a bad turn. “There will be no babies yet, as my wife has come up with a new way to stay un-pregnant. She uses divine intervention—a prayer prior to marital relations is keeping her safe from becoming a mommy before she’s ready to.” They all laugh again.

Fantastic. I just found out my newly formed family is a bunch of real comedians!

“You guys should take your act on the road sometime or at least off a short pier into alligator infested waters,” I quip as I find I’m madder at my husband for divulging our intimate secrets than I am embarrassed.

Mom tries to help me by distracting the comedic line up that is my husband and Eden’s father. “Oh, come here my baby girl. Let me put some sun block on you before you burn out here,” she tells me as she pulls me away from the rat pack.

“Thanks, Mom. They’re brutal, huh?”

“It’s all in good fun, Alyssa,” she tells me as she lathers me up with sunscreen, then hands me the tube. “Go put some on Eden. I don’t want him to get burned either.”

I take the tube over to my wonderful, yet overly talkative husband as he sits in the bullpen with our fathers. I say, flatly, “I have to put sunscreen on you. Mom said.”

He looks at me and his naturally tan face has a slightly amused look to it. “I tan, Alyssa. I don’t need any.”

“Um … but Mom said, Eden. So … I have to. It’s for your own safety,” I tell him, with a fake sweetness.

“Oh, I see. Well, if it’s for my safety then by all means, please,” he responds, with the same fake sweetness to his velvet voice.