That sentence hasn’t stopped echoing in my skull for days.
It’s almost midnight, and I’m still lying here in the dark, one arm flung across my pillow, the other holding my phone above my face as I reread our messages for the hundredth time.
She goes to my school.
She’s not some mystery girl in another state I’ll never meet. She’s here.Right fucking here. Walking the same sidewalks. Sitting in the same lecture halls. Probably stood behind her at the café without even realizing it.
It’s driving me insane.
I let my thumb hover over the screen for a second before typing.
Me:
Confession. I can’t stop thinking about you. It’s actually messing with my head. You’re so close to me and I still don’t know who you are.
I press send before I can overthink it.
Cherry:
I think about you too. More than I probably should. But please don’t come looking for me. Please, Six. I’m not ready.
The words punch through my chest.
She’s not ready.
I get it. I do. I respect it. But it doesn’t stop the restless, gnawing feeling in my ribs. The ache of wanting to know who she is—to finallyseeher. Talk to her. Look her in the eye and say, It’s you. You’re the one who’s been inside my head all this time.
I rake a hand through my hair and drop the phone onto my chest, staring at the ceiling for a minute.
I flip open my laptop and scroll, trying to distract myself with something—anything—else. I click on a movie without thinking, and it takes about five minutes for the memory of watching He’s Just Not That Into You with Maisie that night in her dorm to crash in.
How she quoted every line toward the end. How she snuggled up against me. How I didn’t want it to end. Didn’t want to leave.
Before I know it, I’m reaching for my phone again.
Me:
hey u awake?
It’s a long shot. She’s probably asleep, with Waddles tucked under her arm. But I can’t sleep. And I want to talk to her.
The second my phone lights up, my chest gives this stupid, involuntary squeeze.
Maisie:
Yep. Can’t sleep.
A smile creeps across my face before I can stop it.
Me:
me neither. what are you doing right now?
Maisie:
Watching a movie.
Me:
