I pull back a little, enough that he notices the shift. His arms don’t fall away, but they tense. His eyes search mine.
“Austin?”
He stills completely.
His brow creases, like he already knows something’s coming. “Yeah?”
I hesitate, biting down on the inside of my cheek until I taste blood.
“I have to tell you something.”
He lets out a breathy laugh that’s nowhere near amused. “Oh. Okay. Cool. These words are never terrifying or anything.” He lifts his eyebrows, half-sitting up now. “Please don’t tell me I already fucked up the boyfriend thing. I’ll do anything. Swear to God. I’ll even learn to bake.”
That makes me smile, even though it shouldn’t.
I reach for his hand, lacing our fingers together even though I know what I’m about to say might screw everything up. But I have to say it.
Because I like him.
Too much.
And he deserves to know the truth.
“You’ve done nothing wrong.”
I reach up, brushing my fingers through his stupid, messy hair, pushing it back from his forehead. He’s still got that half-smirk like he’s expecting me to tease him again—but it drops when he sees my face.
“I just… I want to tell you about something,” I murmur. “Or someone.”
His expression sobers a little. “Okay.”
“I’m telling you because I trust you, and I don’t want to hide anything from you.”
Austin nods slowly, his hand sliding down to rest on my thigh. He doesn’t speak, just waits.
“Remember when I said I had a crush before?” I ask quietly, my gaze on his collarbone because looking him in the eyes right now might make me chicken out. “It wasn’t someone from class. Or school. It was this guy I was texting.”
Austin’s hand stills. Completely. I feel his gaze flicker across my face.
“I didn’t even know his name,” I continue. “We met completely by accident. I sent a text to the wrong number. He replied. And we just… kept talking.”
Austin keeps his eyes on me, and I just wish I knew what he was thinking.
“We talked for weeks,” I say, my voice wobbling a little. “I don’t even know how it happened. It just did,” I admit with a shrug. “It was so easy. He made me laugh and he made me feel… seen, I guess.”
I finally look up.
“And then I met you,” I say, my heart thudding against my chest. “And I really,reallyliked you. Even though you annoyed the hell out of me sometimes.”
His mouth twitches. “Only sometimes?”
I narrow my eyes. “I’m trying to tell you something here.”
“Sorry, baby. Continue.” His thumb starts moving again, slow circles on the inside of my knee.
“I told him we couldn’t talk anymore a few weeks ago,” I admit. “Once I started to have feelings for you, it didn’t feel right. But he was still my friend. The only one I had for a while. And I guess…” I pause, my throat tightening. “I guess I still miss him sometimes. That’s all.”
There’s a long pause. He’s looking at me again, not saying anything, and I hate how unsure I suddenly feel.
