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He murmurs, “It’s personal, and if everything works out, it’ll save many people and take down The Association. That’s what we want, right? No more rapes or assaults. No more trafficking. No more innocent sixteen-year-olds being traumatized for life.”

My blood freezes, and I grip the throttle. I think about Taylor, about what The Association did to her when she was sixteen, her future bright in front of her.

How we almost lost her, and then later, Ethan and Alexis, who almost drowned in the Hudson because of them.

So yes, whatever Elias’s personal reasons are withstanding, I want that—revenge, take out some bad people causing harm to innocents. My life and health are shit. And with the way things are spiraling and I still have no answers, no relief, who knows how much time I have left on this earth before I end up mad or dead?

Perhaps this is a way I can contribute to society.

By taking out the trash.

“And Bree will help you do all of this.”

“Yes. It has to be her. No one else can do what she does. If she gets hurt or killed, we’re back at square one. That’s all I’m going to tell you. Do you understand what needs to happen tomorrow?”

I grind my teeth, knowing this is the most I’m going to get out of him. Images of Mom and Raya’s bodies appear behind my eyelids and I shove them away.

“Yes. I understand.”

I’m saving Bree. This is my way of atonement. The Association, an organization I hate with my guts, might go down because of this.

I don’t have all the answers, but I have enough. And when the dust settles…maybe I’ll be able to sleep. Or a miracle will occur and I’ll be at peace and the strange symptoms I’m experiencing will…disappear.

And I can be with her. Olivia.

“Good. Will be in touch.”

He hangs up as a fresh wave of dizziness hits me, followed by the same nagging headache. It’s my body reminding me of my fucked-up symptoms—how someone as screwed up as me can never be with someone as perfect as her.

I pop a few Velowakes into my mouth. My sleep has dwindled to two hours a night now, and I know why.

My trip is ending.

A seagull cries in the distance before taking flight, soaring over the yachts and sailboats docked nearby. A few tourists amble along the coast, taking photos, laughing and chatting.

This is the last stop on the cruise, and in three days, we’ll be chauffeured to our jets to resume normal life in the real world.

Three more days until my temporary forever with Olivia ends.

It’s a strange phrase, but it’s true. While I have the curse or, in this case, the blessing of remembering every moment with her, for Olivia, these memories are temporary.

One day, her memories of me will fade like they do for most folks. Maybe she’ll be on her honeymoon in Greece, holding the hand of a respectable man—a surgeon or a lawyer—and she’d think about the wild month she had a long time ago with a playboy who knew how to fuck but couldn’t give her anything more than that.

Maybe she’d remember how she dove off a cliff for him and she’d smile because it wasn’t something she was keen to do, but at least she did it once.

Maybe she might think of me or search my name online to see what I was up to.

If I were still around then.

It’s debatable, given that my blackouts are happening more often now. This morning, I woke up in the main auditorium when a staff member shook me.

I’m going crazy. After all, that’s the only explanation, right? I’ve seen so many doctors—everything coming back normal.

While I have another appointment with the neurologist next week, I’m not hopeful.

Perhaps one day, I’ll be so out of my mind, I won’t remember her.

Huffing a soft laugh under my breath, I shake my head.