I stop for a moment, thinking about what I can say next.
‘So, it is true what she said, but…’
I am halfway through when I hear a recorded message down the phone.
‘To record your message again, press one, or hang up if you’ve finished recording.’
I stare at it, not knowing what to do as I realise that my time is up. I’ve left an unfinished message telling him that it didn’t seem important to tell him about getting back with Michael.No, no, this has all gone wrong.
I desperately ring back again, but the line is engaged. I start to panic as I imagine Elias’s reaction as he listens to such a terrible message. Why did I not rehearse this before calling? I frantically ring again and again until I get through. When his number eventually rings out, I get that blasted recorded message again.
‘Sorry, I got cut off in half. I’m going to speak super-fast this time. So, yes, he did ask me to get back with him, and I said absolutely not. That’s why I felt it wasn’t important to tell you. It didn’t mean anything to me. Michael got this stupid idea into his head… Probably because he doesn’t have anything better to do right now and thought we could get back together, but I was having none of it. I think it’s because he realised that—’
‘To record your message again, press one, or hang up if you’ve finished recording.’
I scream at the phone.
This time when I call back to continue with my final message, it isn’t engaged. As soon as I hear the bleep, I start with what I really want to say.
‘I think it’s because he realised that I’ve met someone else. Someone I care for more than I ever thought possible. I never expected to meet someone again. I wasn’t looking for love, but somehow I feel as though I have found something I didn’t know I was looking for. I mean, I’m not falling in love… Of course, it’s very early days, but what I’m saying is that if I was to fall in love, then it would definitely be with you. I hope you’ll call me back so we can talk about what’s happened. Please don’t—’
‘To record your message again, press one, or hang up if you’ve finished recording.’
I put the phone down and stare at it in frustration.
I consider calling back to finish the sentence but decide I’d best not spam his voicemail even more. So, I put my phone to one side and hope that he will eventually call back. In the meantime, I meet Soraya for a lunchtime glass of wine. Not something I make a habit of, but there is a lovely wine bar in the marina and, right now, I need Soraya to chat to and the wine to cheer me up.
As only a best friend can, Soraya tries to lift my spirits. She’s sympathetic about my predicament and tells me how much she likes Elias.
‘Andrew thought he was very nice too. Didn’t they get on well?’ she says.
‘Yes, very well. But I don’t need to hear that now, Soraya. Don’t tell me how great he is when I might have lost him. How can I get him to speak to me?’
‘He will. It’s just a silly misunderstanding, and anyway, he lied to you about his money, so he can’t exactly talk about hiding things.’
‘No, I did think he might be a bit more understanding.’
‘Well, maybe he’s busy somewhere. Perhaps he’s out buying a new yacht and so busy negotiating that he can’t come to the phone.’
‘Or avoiding me,’ I say, taking a sip of my Sauvignon. ‘Oh well, there’s plenty more fish in the sea. Anyway, I never wanted another relationship after Michael, so I’m really not bothered. Who cares?’
‘You clearly do,’ smiles Soraya.
‘I don’t. Look, I’ll switch my phone off so he can’t call me even if he wants to.’ As I grab my phone from my handbag, I see four missed calls.
‘Oh my god. It’s Elias, he’s been trying to call!’
‘You see. How glum you looked when you walked in, and now look at you. All smiles again. Just like you were when we were away. I fear he might mean more to you than you even realise, or want to admit to anyone.’
As the phone rings in my hand, I have to agree. All I want is to speak to Elias and hope that he will understand that there was nothing to this Michael business at all. The pessimist in me raises her annoying head to plant the fear that he might be calling to ask me to leave him alone and, for a moment, I look at the phone, scared of what he will say.
‘Answer it, will you,’ says Soraya.
I nod my head and quickly swipe to answer. ‘Elias, hi.’
The line crackles and breaks up.
‘Wait, Elias, let me go outside. I can’t hear you.’
