Zuzana grins at me, and I blush.
‘It’s no problem. It’s been so wonderful meeting you. You feel like family.’
‘What about the rest of the letters? What do I do with the box?’ says Albert.
‘It’s fine. You’ve had it all these years, you keep it here. I think we’ve read all the letters that we needed to.’
‘If you ever come back to Prague, please will you visit us?’ says Albert.
‘I wouldn’t dream of coming to Prague and not seeing you. Look, I’ll write my address down for you. If you’re ever in the UK, you’re always welcome to visit me.’ I give Albert the paper with my address on and bid them farewell.
‘I’m too old for travelling now, but that’s very kind,’ he says.
‘Now, I wish you two the best. Thank you for being such special people. I’ll miss you both.’
They take turns to hug me, and I feel quite emotional leaving them behind.
Once outside, I start my walk to the metro station and breathe in the cold air. I turn around and peer up at the building for one last look.
As I look up, a snowflake lands on my cheek. It’s snowing again. I hold my hand out to catch the snow as I walk away from here for the very last time.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
I don’t know if Tomas asked about me when he turned up at Albert’s, as by the time I leave for the airport, there are still no messages from him. I did consider messaging to say goodbye, but after that awkward moment on New Year’s Eve, I decided better of it. There is no point. All the feelings I have tried to deny throughout the holiday have come crashing down around me as I stand here at the airport. For a while, I felt special and that someone cared about me. Tomas restored my confidence and even my faith in people, but maybe I was wrong.
As I see the aircraft on the tarmac waiting to take me back to the UK, it sinks in that I won’t ever see him again. This is the end. Once again, I feel as though I have lost someone. I have lost my friendship with Tomas because we pushed things too far, and I am saying goodbye to a beautiful city that I have come to love. How could I attach myself to someone and to a place so quickly? It was as though I was part of that family forever, and now it’s all taken away from me again. I am sad as I realise that although I said I’d come back, I most probably won’t ever see Albert and Zuzana again. It is just one of those things you say that makes saying goodbye easier.
When they announce my flight departure, I join the queue to board the plane. Of course, in the movies, this is the point where Tomas would come running towards the boarding gate shouting my name. If this were a movie, I wouldn’t hear him at first, and all the passengers would be willing for me to turn around. Then, eventually, he would catch up with me. I would see him and fall into his arms, and I wouldn’t be going on any flight home.
However, this is the life of good old Olivia Edwards, divorced, originally from Llandysul, and nothing has ever happened to me that is remotely like the stuff you see in the movies. Still, I look over my shoulder and double-check that my name isn’t being called by a surprise passenger behind me, and I somehow can’t hear it because of the baby screaming in front of me.
Foolishly, I look at every face down the passenger line to double-check as they stare at me, wondering why I am looking at them. But there is no Tomas and there is nothing except a long queue of passengers and the squealing baby. Nope, Tomas definitely hasn’t surprised me by secretly running after me. The truth is, Tomas hasn’t even said goodbye.
By the time I land back in the UK, I have accepted that I won’t be seeing him again, and I can hardly blame him when he has the beautiful Milena.
When the taxi arrives back at the mill, it is as though I dreamed my whole trip. It is raining, sludge is pouring out of the drain beside the front door, and there is no sign of my friendly little robin. Perhaps he got bored waiting for me to come back. With no sign of the robin, I find myself bursting into tears as I walk inside the empty mill. I am annoyed at feeling sorry for myself, but now, not even my favourite bird is at home waiting for me. I am alone, and whilst I was happy enough before, I had started to enjoy a taste of having friends again, and, quite frankly, I miss it already. The old stone walls of the mill feel cold and damp, something I never noticed before.
I drop my suitcase by the door as I am not in the mood to unpack right away. I manage to trample upon a red bill from the energy company lying on the top of the mail that arrived while I was away. With the inheritance money, at least I will be able to pay the bills without any worry from now on.
There is gurgling from the tap as I run the water to make tea. Then brown water eventually gushes out, and I realise the pipes have probably clogged up with the frosty weather while I was away. I am used to the dodgy pipework here, but I don’t want to deal with it today. I find myself wishing I was back in the luxury of the five-star hotel.
The snow globe is right where I left it on the table, and I go over and give it a shake. As the snow comes down around the castle, it brings back fresh memories of Tomas and me being there. I can’t remember enjoying myself as much in a long while, and I doubt I will again. I pick my phone up and check it one last time. Just in case. There is nothing from him. I look at his number saved on my phone and press delete along with every message. I don’t need any reminder of Tomas. Like my trip to Prague, it is all in the past.
The mill doesn’t seem to want to warm up, and there isn’t enough firewood left, so I put my coat back on to get some more firewood from outside. It feels colder than Prague in here.
As I get to the shed where I have stored the logs for moments like this, I have to look twice. The little robin is hopping about outside the door.
‘You’re still here.’ I smile.
My favourite robin is a sign that I must have hope for the future. I was fine before I went to Prague, and I will manage once more. Just like the robin, I have spread my wings, and I can do it again. I will not let my experience with Tomas rob me of my new-found confidence.
I get the robin some food and head back indoors to get the fire going. Finally, it starts roaring and all that is needed are the comforting sweets I have in my suitcase. Calories don’t count at times like this.
I go into my suitcase to search for the bags of liquorice. Right on top is the gold jacket, which I certainly no longer need. I may as well give it to the church jumble sale. It is not like I can wear it to feed the birds! I throw it over to one side on the floor, step over it and head back to the sofa to toast my feet in front of the fire. Then I eat my bag of liquorice until my tummy hurts and send myself off to bed before I end up greedily searching for any more snacks. Besides, I have an early start tomorrow as my homecoming coincides with Dewi’s return to the office. He needs me to sign the paperwork that will see my inheritance transferred to me.
The one good thing about my trip to Prague is that I am no longer afraid of going into town. For the first time in two years, I drive confidently. After travelling to Prague alone, this is a doddle. I realise that I can conquer more than I thought and will no longer doubt my capabilities.
By the time I walk into the solicitors’ office, clutching the bag of liquorice, I am quite excited to meet Dewi for the first time. We have spoken so many times before, and although we still haven’t met face to face, I immediately recognise him from the newspaper article.
