“What does it supposed to do for me.” Now he had all of my attention.
“It’s a stabilizer, a formula that I perfected in Lagos. You can call it a mood harmonizer. It will move through your body slowly, binding itself to your neurons, balancing your highs and lows. One dose, and you won’t need to smoke for weeks at a time.” Nemesis smiled and held it out.
I reached out; my fingertips brushed the cool glass.
“How do I ingest it?”
“You drink it,” He stated simply.
“A small ounce now, another ounce in precisely three weeks in a half from today. Theres no side effects beyond clarity. It willnot make you less, Kenric, it will make you more.” He stated with so much conviction; I almost instantly believed him.
“Why did you make this for me?” I asked, struggling to accept the kind gesture.
I trusted Nemesis, there were no second thoughts about taking what he created for me. Tone cared about me; even said he loved me a few times. He sacrificed a lot of his time to make sure that I was okay. Nemesis was the person responsible for helping me perfect my scientific lab flower. He further instructed me, took the time to teach me when he had no obligations to do so.
I struggled with thinking that maybe one day the people that claimed to care and do things for me would change overnight. Like my mom did. In Pops eyes she never changed because he was always high out of his mind, and maintaining his rulership over the streets. I was the one that took the biggest blow to my already fragile young heart.
One day, I had a loving mom that shared the same love for creating…to a mom that change with a snap of her fingers. The vile things she started to say out of pure hurt from my pops not loving her correctly. To the drugs controlling her moods. Then my parent’s death.
“I have seen you fight your own fire, Kenric. This is more than business. Believe it or not, I view you as my brother. I only come to this watered-down country for two people…that’s Dreamer Davinchi Davis, and Kenric Love Mastiff. You know, I risk my life to travel… I love my life now that I have Prophecy and my beautiful kids in it. I risk my life because I do not want to see you fall to your own mind, sadness, and trauma while I am alive. You’ve found purpose…I see it, and now that I see you in the flesh, I can feel it.” Nemesis smiled.
For a moment, silence stretched between us.
“Tell me, Kenric…Why the watch? What is it that’s cutting our visit short this evening?” He asked.
I set the bottle carefully down on the counter and glanced back down at my watch. Mira’s face effortlessly popped into my mind. Her eyes big and innocent, her angelic voice…I couldn’t wait to see her in that silk black gown.
“A woman.” I finally said.
Nemesis took a seat across from me and chuckled.
“Undone by beauty.” Nemesis nodded his head in approval, but I had to correct him.
“Not undone…Obsessed.” I said.
His brows rose as he let my words hang in the air.
“And what is obsession but love without balance?” He asked.
“It’s more than love. It’s need. I watched her once and felt my world slow down. Hearing her play, my impulses stopped. My storms cleared. She made me laugh without trying. With her, I think about tomorrow when all I’ve ever lived for was tonight.”
Nemesis studied me, weighing my words against science itself.
“And what do you want from her?”
I looked at the glowing bottle, then back at him.
“I want her to fall in love, so that when she realizes she belongs to me, it’s not chains that keep her here…it will be her own heart.” I stated honestly.
I did everything with force, and control. I planned on using my methods with Mira yet something inside of me tugged differently. Her name alone made something coil in my chest. I locked eyes with Nemesis’s gleaming eyes before he spoke.
“Will you fall? There’s so much confliction that I see in your eyes, my brother.”
I shook my head confidently.
“I don’t fall, I claim…and, love? I told myself when I was thirteen that it wasn’t shit unless it tethered to control. Becauselove without ownership has been proven to be chaos in my world. It burns too fast until there’s nothing left but ashes and regret. The love that I thought I wanted to experience, submits to your name like my momma did with Pops.” I shook my head roughly then swallowed down the lump in my throat that showed a sign of my emotions swirling inside of me.
“The twist that fucks me up, Nemesis is that Mira makes me question my own code. Not because she’s weak or easy to break…to me she’s the opposite. She’s soft in all the right places. Her spirit is untamed… I don’t just feel peace from her playing her treasured violin, and it’s not just wrapped in silence. It’s how she looks at me… her big owl-like eyes are always full of hope. I crave her, and it's not just her body. I already know I could own that. It’s her simply breathing next to me, she makes the demons in my head shut the fuck up. I just want her to choose me now. Choose me with her heart, body, and soul. I never had a person simply just choose me.” I said the last part lowly.
