I turned away when Blake began to dress, giving him a privacy he didn’t require.But we were in public, and despite growing up around paranorms, American social standards were deeply ingrained in me.My cheeks heated as if I’d accidentally walked in on someone changing.It was a very delayed and unnecessary reaction.I was still trying to find my equilibrium.
Since Blake wasn’t about to shift and kill us all, I took the time to survey the chamber.More vampires must have shown up during the fight.The amount of ash covering the floor was insane.How did vampires clean up after this much killing?A battery-powered vacuum?And did any of the ash piles contain Satine’s remains?
My gaze caught on Christian.He was focused on me.He was still rigid, still angry-looking.I gave him a tight smile meant to tell him I was relieved he was here and okay.His expression didn’t change though, and that made me feel like he was hiding something, andthatmade me worry he was hurt.
I scanned him head to toe as I approached.I didn’t know how long he’d been there or if he and the two werewolves had to fight their way to the chamber.His left elbow was bleeding where it had scraped against something, and his jeans were on the dirty side.Other than those two minor things, he looked fine.
“Are you okay?”I asked.He didn’t respond.“What happened?”
Did his jaw just lock shut?His eyes were a clear, sharp blue, but his body language was off, almost as off as when I’d first met him.I’d thought he was a paranorm then.When he acted like this, all closed off and withdrawn, I forgave myself for the assumption.
Finally, he exhaled.His shoulders relaxed, and his expression turned less severe.“Satine escaped.”
Of course she couldn’t be dead.That would have been too easy.We would have to stay on alert.Watch each other’s backs.This was exhausting, always waiting for the next catastrophe to gut punch me.
“The vampires who sided with her are dead or gone too,” Christian continued.“So are the ones who didn’t choose an allegiance.”
“My vampires will take care of them,” Jared said.
Take care of themmeant only one thing in the paranormal world.
“You’re killing vampires who choose neutrality.”My words sounded more like I was observing a stone sitting on grass than discussing the murder of a not small number of paranorms.
“It must be done,” Jared said.
“Of course it must,” I replied.“The vampires are guilty of the high crime of not falling to their knees at your feet.”
“Sarcasm is not necessary.”Jared’s dark gaze felt… intrusive and vaguely familiar.Months ago, I’d rescued him from Arcuro.He’d been half drained, and he’d bitten me outside The Rain.A connection formed between us.Fortunately, it faded over time.
This better fade too.
“Sarcasm is the only defense I have against this life.”
“God, Kennedy.”Nora’s voice cut through the air.“You brood worse than a vampire.The world isn’t out to get you.You’re alive.Jared controls the compound.This is a win.”
A raw anger flared hot inside my chest.“A year ago, my parents were alive.The number of times someone tried to kill me was zero.So was the number of times I’d been forced to kill.No one limited my choices or threatened my friends.”
Friends like Garion.Shit.How badly had I screwed up chasing Nora out of the Null?
Oblivious of my problems or just flat-out indifferent, Nora lifted her shoulders in a callous shrug.“Fine.Be weak.”
The words cut like the sharpest blade across my skin, stunning me first, then seeping through my defensive walls to circle around in my mind.I didn’t want to look too closely at Nora’s accusation, but it demanded to be seen, to be felt, to be reckoned with.
Nora thought I was weak.That couldn’t be true.Time and again, I put myself at risk to save others, to saveherjust an hour ago.
I tried so damn hard to be strong, but what if Nora was right?I might be changing things, dismissing old traditions and creating a new normal, but was I also running from reality?I’d run my senior year.I’d let Lehr and Arcuro make me small.When they’d killed the unsanctioned, I allowed that to be the end of a story instead of a plot twist.
“This wasn’t a win,” Blake said, pulling me out of my spiraling thoughts.“Satine was overconfident.She’ll be back with more vampires.You’ve only increased the amount of danger you’re in.Both of you.”
Nora and I.He didn’t care about Jared’s safety—not unless it affected hers too—and Christian was just a human, not important enough to warrant the smallest consideration.
“Leave us,” Jared commanded.I tensed, expecting Blake’s aura to turn excessively violent again.It took a moment to realize Jared was speaking to the vampires, not to Blake.
I hadn’t exactly forgotten about them.They’d just been so silent and still that my exhausted mind had chosen to conserve energy and ignore them.
As one, they bowed their heads respectfully.Then, without a vocalized word, all except Marco filed out of the chamber.He stood an arm’s length away and held out what had to be a stupidly expensive glass water bottle.“I hope you know what you’re doing, kid.”
My mouth quirked into a smile.“Are you the compound’s logistics manager?You’re magicking clothes and drinks out of nowhere.”
