Page 45 of Beautiful Notes


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2. Walk around Fisher Lake - snowball fight optional

3. Painting my kitchen

I laugh as I pull up the list to determine what activity we should do first, seeingpainting my kitchenas a new addition on the list, knowing exactly where his brain was going when he added it. Can’t say I’d be opposed to another painting day, it’s been ages since our last night together, even longer since the painting day, and I feel like I'm growing cobwebs.

“What are you laughing at?” Caroline asks from the other side of the island.

My face reddens as I hand her my phone showing her the list.

“Subtle, ha-ha.” She laughs in response. Caroline may have torn Noah’s head off last time they were together but she is the biggest Noah fan there is. Wanting my happiness, she is constantly pushing me to trust him a little more and give us an opportunity. I just don’t know if I can ever fully trust him the way I used to.

“He got cleared to start walking full weight and drive again. So we have to pick something to do. We are determining which is better, Milwaukee or Fisher Creek and let’s be honest, we all know the city is the place to be,” I respond. “Help me come up with more activities to prove that to him.”

“There is nothing to prove, since he is wrong.” she says as she begins walking back down the hallway to her room.

4. Book Binding Class

5. Paint and Sip

6. Tasting at Bobbers

7. Mitchell Park Domes

8. Kneland-Bennett Family BBQ

I freeze as I read the rest of the list. It's already almost April, and we are definitely going to still have snow on the ground but it also means that the annual barbeque is in less than two months. Our families have maintained their friendship over the years even when Noah and I did not. The family barbeque is always at the end of May or beginning of June to simulate the start of the change of weather into summer. Noah and I haven’t attended the event since the one during my senior year of high school. I always made excuses not to attend, whether it be being busy with school or work, or having a migraine, but in truth I never went because of the possibility that Noah would be there. Penelope and Cole made sure to do their recon to let me know well in advance if he would be home.

Now, we’re both home and we are on good terms. We can both go to the party this year. However, part of me is afraid to be thrown back into that environment, will it be weird spending time with Ms. Kneland? I know I saw her briefly over the holidays but to actually spend consistent time with her? Will they accept me back into their life like I was in high school? The other part of me, the bigger part feels relieved. Relieved that I don’t have to hide from my family, from the people who meant the most to me. I’ll be able to bring Mason, Caroline, and Savannah, and not have to come up with an excuse as to why we couldn’t go other than the fact that Noah is home.

That is when it finally hits me, avoiding someone important to you, to live in the past is absolutely exhausting.

I take out my phone and text Noah.

Me: What should our first activity be?

He wastes no time replying

Noah: Activity? Do you mean date?

Me: Yes. What activity do you want to do?

I hope he feels the emphasis I tried to place on the activity.

Noah:You.

I smirk, even though I have no idea how to respond to that. But we really do need to make a plan for the weekend and we really shouldn’t be intimate. If therapy has taught me anything over the last decade it’s that we need to commit to the emotional side of a relationship and determine if the connection is actually there aside from the physical aspect.

Which is exactly the opposite of where this relationship started, so I vow to myself to focus strictly on the emotional connection moving forward. But lord, the sex was good and if I’m to be addicted to anything in my life, it's sex with Noah Kneland.

Chapter 36

Olivia

Today’sgoingtobemy favorite day with Noah yet, I already know it. I can feel it. You know when you wake up in the morning, the sun is shining, but it's not too hot or too cold? Warm enough to leave the window open, because the city is busy but quiet, and it's just perfect today. You can just tell it's going to be a good day.

And I get to spend it with Noah.

I have been going to Fisher Creek a lot lately with Noah’s rehab, and Penelope officially moving back in with my parents, so it's just easier for me to go there.