But I didn’t let him finish, the apology tumbling from my lips in a rush. “I messed up, and I understand if you can’t trust me. But I promise, from here on out, no more secrets, no more lies. I care about you, Marc. You know how much I care about for you…more than I ever thought possible.”
“I want to believe you,” he said finally, his voice low and measured. “But after everything that’s happened, it’s hard to trust anyone.”
His words cut through me like a knife, but I knew he was right. Trust had to be earned, and I had a long way to go before he’d open up to me again.
But that didn’t mean I wouldn’t try—not when there was still so much between us left unsaid.
I took a deep breath. “I need you to hear how much I regret not being upfront with you from the beginning. I was scared and unsure of myself, but that’s no excuse. You trusted me, and I let you down.” But now it was time to come clean. “That first day when I saw you at school, I was terrified.”
He looked at me, a flicker of surprise in his eyes. “Terrified? Of me?”
I nodded, swallowing hard. “Not of you. But of the situation. Because I recognized you, Marc. I was a big fan of Magic Marco. A really big fan.” I rushed to explain myself, my words tumbling out in a rush. “You see, it’s hard in this small town…meeting people who understand what it’s like to be different.” My voice dropped to a whisper as I spoke. “There were days when Magic Marco and those group chats were my lifeline to a… a larger queer culture, chatting and talking to guys who were like me, all of us watching you. And for that, Marc… for that, I will always be grateful.”
His eyes narrowed as he studied me, the silence stretching between us. He just sat there under the moonlight, staring at me with wide eyes. Then, slowly, he nodded. “I see,” he said softly.
We sat in silence for an eternity, the air charged with those unspoken words.
I wanted him to say something—anything—to break the silence.
But all he did was sit there and stare at me.
He spoke again, his voice soft and unsure. “Why didn’t you tell me once we became friends?”
I sighed heavily and shrugged my shoulders slightly. “Honestly? I wasn’t sure how to bring it up.” I started plucking at some blades of grass beneath us. “At first, I just didn’t want to embarrass you or make things uncomfortable since I was your daughter’s teacher.”
The silence stretched between us. Marc was quiet, his eyes still trained on me, waiting for me to continue.
“And then…” I trailed off, gathering my thoughts. I took a deep breath and looked back at him. “And then we started to talk. We became friends. You shared about Mia, your struggles, your dreams…and somewhere along the line, I realized I wasn’t justtalking to Magic Marco anymore. I was talking to Marc Mendez.” I swallowed hard, my heart heavy. This was it. The moment of truth. “As we talked, my feelings for you grew deeper than I ever thought possible. The thought of losing you, of not having you in my life... I was in love with you,” I whispered. “By that time, Magic Marco was a distant memory. All I thought about… all I wanted… was you, Marc. I loveyou.”
My heart raced as I poured out my soul to Marc, each word a piece of my soul laid bare. Raw, exposed, but also hopeful—hopeful that he saw the depth of my love and the sincerity of my apology.
Marc sat still for a moment longer, still inscrutable. Then he let out a long sigh and nodded slowly.
His reaction wasn’t what I had hoped for—no grand declaration of love or forgiveness—but it was a start. A reluctant smile crept onto my face, the tightness in my shoulders loosening just a bit. The fear of outright rejection that had been knotting up my stomach all evening began to unravel.
A glimmer of hope, for the first time in days. “I’m sorry,” I said again. “For not telling you sooner. For not being honest from the start.” As I spoke, my words tumbled out like water from a dam, fueled by the emotions welling up inside me. “We’ve only known each other for a short time, but I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. You make me want to be a better person, not just for you, but for Mia too. I messed up, but I’m asking for a second chance. I promise, from now on, I’ll be honest with you, even when it’s hard.”
Marc didn’t respond right away; instead, he stared off into the distance as if lost in thought. Finally, he turned to me. “Ken,” he whispered, his voice low and tired. “I want to believe you, I really do. But there’s so much at stake here. It isn’t just you and me anymore. Mia is my whole world, and I can’t risk her gettinghurt again, or having to lose another important person in her life if something happens to us.”
I saw the anguish in his eyes, his love for Mia battling against his own desires. It pained me to see him so torn, and I wished more than anything that I could take away that burden. “I understand that trust is something I need to earn back from you,” I said gently. “But please hear me—I would never do anything to hurt you or Mia. All I want is to be a part of your lives, to help you build the future you both deserve.”
He looked away for a moment, as if considering my words, and then back at me. “You’ve given me a lot to think about, Ken,” he said, his voice barely more than a whisper. “I need some time.”
“I understand,” I replied, my heart sinking slightly. But I nodded, accepting his need for space. “I’ll give you all the time you need. Because you’re worth it. You and Mia both.” I paused, biting my lip. “Are you still leaving town?”
But Marc didn’t answer that question.
With that, we both fell silent, each lost in our own thoughts as the night deepened around us. I didn’t want to leave, and he didn’t ask me to go.
It was as if just sitting there next to each other was enough for now.
After a few minutes I stood, breaking the silence. “Let me know if there’s anything…” I didn’t finish the sentence. “Anyway, thanks for hearing me out.”
Marc followed me as I walked out of the backyard. “Your car’s parked right in front,” Marc observed, a hint of surprise coloring his voice. His dark eyes flicked toward my sedan.
“I meant what I said, Marc. If you give us a chance, there will be no hiding, no being ashamed—not here, not anywhere.” Cupped his face in my hands, my thumbs brushed over hischeekbones. “I want to be with you, and I don’t care who knows it. I’m done hiding, done pretending to be someone I’m not.”
Then, under the glow of the moonlight, I leaned into Marc, frozen in place as our lips met. His lips were soft and hesitant, mirroring the uncertainty in his eyes. It was a kiss filled with longing and regret, with a promise of better days.
