“One of which has nearly passed. And I’m less likely to be noticed if I go during the biggest wave, not on either end of it.”
I want to yell, “I’ll go with you,” but I know it isn’t possible. Father won’t allow it. And I haven’t thought things through. I can’t leave, not with Mother still sleeping. She could awaken at any moment, and I must be here to greet her. I can’t flee north, nor build a boat, nor accompany Rahz to Lemossin, even if we could scrounge up the money.
I press my face into Rahz’s chest. He’s warmed up from being under the covers with me. His heartbeat under my cheek soothes me. “This is terrible.”
“Maybe it isn’t.” He rubs my back in little circles, chasing the worry away. Trying to. “We don’t know yet.”
I’m afraid to ask my next question but force the words out anyway. “When will you depart?”
“Falen must speak with Bird. She’d like to use the extra time to raise the coin needed to tag along with us, but Falen would rather get it over with. I agree. If he can get Bird to make peace with staying behind, we’ll leave next week.”
My muscles tense.Next week.My heart thuds faster. I curl my fingers in his soft sleep shirt and tug him closer. “So soon?”
Rahz kisses my forehead. “Yes, and all the sooner shall I return. Hopefully, armed with the answers to at least some of my questions.”
“And…will you sign?” I already suspect he won’t pledge, but maybe he’ll sign? I squint my eyes shut, but I can’t escape the feeling of him shaking his head.
“I’m not planning to. I don’t think it’s wise. As long as I make the trip, no one in the village will have any reason to suspect I didn’t complete the mission.”
“Falen will know.”
“He seems reasonable. I have two weeks to either sway him to my point of view or, failing that, convince him my actions are my own and not to say anything to the others. I don’t think he’d come running back to Vander to tattle anyway. He’s above such petty acts.”
I certainly hope so. Grinding my teeth, I think of Vander. I’d love to blame him for this, but it’s not like he has any control over the queen’s commands.
If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s hers. She is taking my Rahz from me. Why then should I be faithful to her?
Perhaps I shouldn’t. Perhaps Rahz is right after all. He often is.
“It’s only a month, Jin. It’ll go by before we know it.”
I choke back a sob. I don’t want to be sad anymore, not when I can be angry instead. Curse Aurielle for demanding this of us. We’re doing fine without her, here, on our own, in Jodpirn. Why do we need the fae court anyway? What have they done for us?
Rahz weasels his big thigh between my legs and presses against my groin. It feels nice, though my body is soft, and my mind isn’t thinking of bed play. Instead, it’s whirling with change.
“Let me take your mind off it, hmm?” says Rahz, his voice all low and rumbly.
Normally, that’s all it would take to put me in the mood, but I feel as if I’ve fallen off a horse, then gotten trampled by the rest of the herd. Even sex can’t fix that.
Rahz glides a hand down my back, cups my ass, and gives it a good squeeze.
I conduct my own investigation with my thigh, only to discover he isn’t hard either. I’m relieved. “Maybe in the morning? For now, I just want you to hold me.”
“You sure?” His arms tighten around my waist.
I nod and tuck myself as close to him as possible.
One week and this bed will be so empty without him.
One week.
ChapterEleven
~One WeekLater~
Rahz
As we emergeout of the shady pine forest we’ve traversed all morning, the view opens to a wide cloudless lavender sky and a horizon so distant as to remind me of my insignificance. The world is a huge place, and I’m just a little speck astride the slightly bigger speck called Magna.
