“No thank you, I need to eat with my family. Maybe you can join us some day?” he asked.
“Maybe,” I said. He waved and ran back to sit next to his mother.
“Gathering fans already?” Finlay asked. I laughed. We were soon joined by Matilda. Sam and Medow were the last to sit down. The conversation was just as nice as the day before. While Finlay, Martin and Sam discussed pack business, Medow and Matilda shared all the things they thought I needed to know about who was dating who in the pack and other gossip. As we had eaten and were getting ready to get up, I found the courage to ask Finlay if he had time during the day for a talk. He looked at me for a moment and nodded.
“How about a walk and I can show you where the celebrations will take place while we talk?” he asked. I nodded, and we said goodbye to the rest of the group. Finlay took me along a gravelled path that led into the forest. Even though it was early, pack members were walking back and forth on the path, carrying things. Everyone was getting ready for the full moon. “This is where we celebrate most of our big events,” Finlay told me. We had reached a big clearing. On one side of it, the creek ran. In the middle there was a large fire pit and around it there were logs and wooden benches to sit on. Pack members were setting up foldable tables at one end of the clearing and others were chopping wood and piling it by the firepit. “Let’s go this way, it’s less busy,” he told me and I followed him along a dirt track into the forest. When we had left everyone behind us, I took a deep breath and savoured the forest scents.
“I haven’t been completely honest with you,” I started.
“No?”
“No. I didn’t think it would matter, because I never thought I would accept your offer.”
“But that has changed?” he asked, trying to hide a smile.
“Maybe. I won’t know unless I tell you everything,” I said. We had come to a viewpoint. We were standing on a piece of raised land, looking out over a slope that led down to a river. On the other side there was more rich forest and then the mountain.It was a beautiful spot. “The reason I left my old pack was not only because of my latency,” I told him. He was quiet, but when I glanced his way, I saw all his attention was on me. “I was the daughter of the Beta. I grew up with the son of the Alpha, the daughter of the Gamma and my older brother. We were as close as you can get. We were the future of the pack. The Alpha and Gamma were like my uncles. I grew up knowing they would protect me, just like my father would. When my wolf didn’t come to me, they all assured me it didn’t matter, that I was good enough as I was. And I mostly believed them.” I paused and took a deep breath. We were heading into painful territory and I needed to brace myself. “I turned eighteen the day after a full moon. The pack was gathered to celebrate the moon and my mother and the Luna brought out a surprise birthday cake for me at the stroke of midnight. And I found my mate, the son of the Alpha, James.” His name came out as a whisper. I hadn’t spoken it out loud in four years and it twisted the dagger in my heart.
“You found your mate?” I looked up at Finlay and I could see he hadn’t meant the question to be spoken out loud.
“I did, and in the next heartbeat he was rejecting me. I wasn’t strong enough to be his Luna,” I said, and I could hear the bitter notes in my voice. Finlay drew in a sharp breath and looked at me like he had a hard time believing me. “After that, things changed. I overheard my father talk to the Alpha. The man that had been like a second father to me, told my father it would be best if I was sent away from the pack. To spare both me and his son the pain when James would choose a new mate. I heard my mother and the Luna being at odds with each other and how much hurt was in my brother’s voice. The pack that I thought would always have my back, that would protect me, turned their back on me. My parents and brother were paying the price.”
“So you left,” he said in a soft voice. I had been looking at the river, but now I turned to face him.
“I did. To protect myself and my family. They could heal once I was gone, and hopefully save their relationship with their pack and friends.”
“Do you keep in contact with them?”
“No. My father would come for me if he knew where I was. I send them birthday cards every year. But I drive to another state to send them. Hiding my tracks as best I can.” I had never told anyone this before.
“I’m sorry,” he said. I shrugged, as if it wasn’t a big deal. But it was. A single tear rolled down my cheek and I rubbed it away. “I have no words for how your mate treated you. You are not weak, Amie. You survived a rejection from your true mate, you survived leaving your pack and you built a life for yourself. You are strong. And if he couldn’t see it, then he is a fool and his pack will be weaker because of it. If you join my pack, we will be there when you need us. We have been through what you have. We chose to leave our old pack to seek a better life. This pack has a strong bond, we care for our own and physical strength isn’t the measurement we use to value a pack member. I was right when I felt like you would be a good fit for us. If you have been raised in a Beta household, you must have learnt things. None of the top ranks, including me, have had formal training for our roles. We could use someone like you. But I won’t make you choose now. Let’s stick to the plan to take the day as it comes and we’ll have another talk tomorrow. Okay?” I looked up at Finlay.
“You’re not going to ask me to leave?” I asked. He chuckled.
“Because you didn't tell me everything? You had known me for less than thirty minutes. I don’t expect that kind of loyalty. I’m honoured that you shared it with me now,” he told me. I nodded.
“Then I would like to stick to the plan,” I said.
“I’m happy to hear it, Amie.”
“Armeria,” I said, and it sounded foreign. He looked at me. “It’s my full name.” He smiled and nodded.
“Armeria,” he said, and it sounded nice coming from him. “Matilda has been insisting she get to show you around today. Is that okay?” he asked.
“It is. I like her,” I told him as we turned around to head back.
“She can be intimidating, but she is an amazing wolf. We are lucky that she joined us,” he said.
Hours later, we were all sitting by a roaring fire. Pups were running around playing and elderly wolves were telling tales about past glory. It amused me how much it was the same as it had been in my former pack. I fell back into my old habits as I helped hand out blankets to those that needed, and I offered to look after the pups when everyone was going to shift. Matilda frowned at me.
“Why aren’t you joining in the fun?” she asked. I realised no one had told them about me.
“I’m latent,” I said. Matilda burst out laughing, the last response I had expected. Then she stopped and looked at me.
“You are serious?” she asked.
“Aunt, careful,” Finlay said as a warning. She waved him off.
“I am,” I said.
