Even as the thought entered his mind, another one crowded in beside it: He’d known Donna for mere seconds compared to his son’s relationship, and yet, he felt more connected to her than any other person in his life. They’d each shared parts of themselves they’d kept hidden, too afraid or ashamed to reveal to anyone else. They’d lowered walls and invited each other into the dark places. What did that say about them? About their future? Did they evenhavea future?
He shook away the thought, trying to concentrate on what his son was saying. Something about a clog in the showerhead. Vick had shown him the main water valve and given him instructions. Instructions that he hadn’t heard. But he could probably figure out the gist.
Rhett turned off the valve, still lost in his thoughts as Vick stepped inside the shower to remove the nozzle and examine the blockage. He’d have to broach the topic gently, maybe even indirectly. His son had been running his own life long before he’d entered the picture, and he doubted Vick would appreciate unsolicited advice. Especially on matters of the heart.
A suffocating heaviness settled across Rhett’s chest at an unbidden memory. His own father had never been big on emotions—showing them or discussing them. According to his old man, feelings belonged to the womenfolk.
The day his father left, he’d sat him down on the scorching concrete steps of their apartment building in Stockton. A group of neighbor kids had dragged a sprinkler head into the middle of the asphalt parking lot, and their screeching laughter had permeated the silence between them. All the while, his father’s new girlfriend had watched them from the passenger seat of their family sedan, the smoke from her cigarette curling out the window. His mom never let anyone smoke in the car.
“Son,” his dad had said. “There are some things you won’t understand until you’re older. Things like love. No one really knows how it works. But sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes you make a mistake and don’t get it right the first time, so you have to try again. But I want you to know that me leaving has nothing to do with you, okay?”
Rhett had nodded. He knew it didn’t have anything to do with him. Because if it had, if his dad had cared about him and had calculated him into his decision at all, he never would’ve left.
His father had given him one pat on the head, stood, and slid into the driver’s seat. Rhett waited on the steps, his basketball shorts sticking to the sweat on the backs of his legs. He watched, waiting for his father to look back or catch his eye in the rearview mirror. But he didn’t.
Even at ten years old, he knew something wasn’t right. Family shouldn’t be anif at first you don’t succeed, try and try againkind of thing. If he ever fell in love and had a family of his own, it would be for life. Ditching them to start over wasn’t an option. He didn’t want to be like his father. The kind of man who thought leaving his son money after his death—money Rhett refused to touch—would somehow atone for abandoning him in life. He wanted to be the kind of man who stuck around.
Rhett’s lips quirked in a sad, sardonic smile. For all his laudable, ten-year-old intentions, he’d wound up exactly like his father, just for different reasons.
“Ready!” Vick shouted as if he’d tried to get his attention before and Rhett had been too engrossed in his thoughts to notice.
Startled into the present, Rhett wrenched the lever all the way to the left. At the sound of his son’s yell, he quickly yanked it the other way, shutting off the water flow.
Vick stepped out from the shower, sopping wet. “I said turn it back onslowly.” He swiped water from his eyes, flinging the droplets onto the ground.
“Sorry about that.” Rhett flashed a sheepish grin then sensed an opening. “I guess slow and steady is the way to go. Clearly, too much too fast is a recipe for disaster.” He gestured to his son’s soaked clothes. “I should’ve been patient and waited for the right time, not gone full force right out of the gate, huh?”
Vick cocked his head. “Please don’t tell me you just tried to drown me to prove a point.”
“Not intentionally. But why let a good object lesson go to waste?”
Vick sighed and grabbed a towel off a makeshift clothesline. “Fine. Let’s get it over with.” He briskly ran the towel over his hair, which he still wore in a high-and-tight military cut. “I got the ring catalog from a jewelry store in Primrose Valley. I took a look around, then they gave me the catalog and told me to go home and think about it.”
“That’s good advice. Marriage is something you should think about.Hard.” Rhett paused, debating how much more he should say. He’d already come this far… “Maybe,” he said cautiously, “if you can’t decide on a ring, you’re not ready to make a decision as big as marriage.” As soon as the words left his mouth, he knew he’d been too harsh.
Vick met his gaze, unflinching, and tossed the towel over his shoulder. “Two carat canary diamond, radiant cut in a yellow gold setting with pave diamonds down the sides. It’s bright, cheerful, and beautiful, just like Lucy.”
Rhett blinked in surprise. “I’m confused. If you know what you want, why the catalog?”
“They thought I couldn’t make up my mind, but the truth is…” For a brief moment, Vick dropped his gaze. “I can’t afford it yet,” he murmured. Then, almost immediately, he straightened, lifting his head. “But I will. Soon.”
Rhett studied his son. He stood tall, determined, and sure-footed. He was a man of honor. The kind of man who lived and died by his commitments. The kind of man you could count on. And in that moment, he realized a hard truth: his fears had more to do with his own failings than his son’s.
In tune with his thoughts, Vick’s features softened. “I don’t think this is about me and Lucy.”
“What do you mean?”
“You still feel guilty about what happened between you and mom. About the choices you made. It’s why you won’t admit that you like Donna.”
“I don’t—” The words stalled in his throat. He couldn’t deny it. Not anymore. Not to his son.
“Yeah, you do,” Vick said kindly. “But for some reason, you think falling in love with someone else will be another betrayal. Like you owe it to Mom to stay single for the rest of your life. How am I doing so far? Am I close?”
Rhett marveled at his son’s perceptiveness. Or maybe he didn’t hide his emotions as well as he’d thought. “That about sums it up.”
Vick nodded sadly. “Here are a few things you should know. First, it’s not your fault Mom died. It was cancer, not a broken heart. And secondly—” He took a breath, as if his next words were a long time coming. “If she could see you now, see how you’ve changed, I think she’d forgive you for what happened. And I think she’d want you to be happy.” Vick hesitated before adding softly, “I know I do, Dad.”
A tightness in his chest rose to his throat as he stared at his son, unable to grasp what he’d heard.Dad…He’d all but given up hope that he’d ever hear Vick say that word.
