9
Wesley
January 2025
Idon’t hear from Avery again after her single text message. Still, I watch her from a distance. Over the course of three months, she fires three management teams and gets backlash for canceling prior commitments. It’s not like I can be upset because she doesn’t have time for me when she’s dealing with so much on her own.
And with the reunion coming up, I throw myself into practicing whenever I can.
When I go home for Christmas, Mom turns on the TV to watch Avery’s holiday special like she does every year. It’s her way of feeling like Avery is celebrating with us, as if when Avery looks at the camera she’s staring right at us, wishing us a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Maybe she is, maybe she knows we’re watching. I like to think she does, that she knows we’ve never stopped being here for her.
Me
Merry Christmas. I watched your performance on the TV but wish I could see you in person.
The text is a long shot, but I send it anyway.
Avery
Save your flirting for someone who cares.
Me
You wound me.
Me
There’s no one else.
When she doesn’t respond I think I’ve lost her. I knew I shouldn’t have had that third glass of wine.
Avery
Merry Christmas. And good luck with rehearsals, I know they start soon.
Me
If you’re still trying to figure out what gift to get me, you could come out a few days early and watch one of them.
It’s not just that I want us all there like it used to be. I’m tense as hell, my chest clenches whenever I think of what's to come and it's hard to breathe. The four of us never got a proper final performance, part way through our last concert Luca was injured and I know it was my fault for so many reasons. The reunion is our final chance to have the performance we deserved. It’s been ten years, but I’m terrified that instead of healing, our wounds have festered.
Avery
I’m busy. I’ll see you at the reunion.
Me
I’ll see you then.
When I arrive at our rehearsal space in Atlanta a week later, I find the parking lot empty. I didn’t expect to be the first one here. Turning off my car, the low hum of nerves in the back of my mind rises to a crescendo.
Without thinking, I reach for my phone, click Avery’s contact and start typing. I have to toss my phone into the passenger seat to stop myself. What the fuck am I thinking? She all but told me she doesn’t want to be here.
But she’s the one person I feel like I can confess things to, because there was a time she was the one person I told everything to. That I want this rehearsal to feel like the ones we had when we first started and that in some dream world, we walk out of this reunion being able to talk regularly and are friends again. It’s a stupid wish.
A red vintage convertible with the top up pulls into the parking lot, and I take it as my cue to get over myself. I slip from the car just as Garrett and Evelyn get out of the other.
“Of course you’d rent a Porsche,” Evelyn says, bypassing any form of polite greeting.
