When I open them a moment later, Annabelle’s gaze is on me, watching us through teary eyes. Keeping one arm around Grace, I wrap my other arm behind me to hold Claire to my back as I stand up. Motioning to Annabelle with my chin, I say, “Group hug.”
She wraps her arms around the three of us, and we just take a moment.
As a kid, I drifted from one friend’s house to another while my mom worked double shifts and multiple jobs. Our tiny apartment was technically ours, but it never felt like home when I was there alone, which was almost always. Some friends’ families would invite me for dinner or let me stay the night, but I could feel the strain. None of them could afford another mouth to feed, and I never wanted to be a burden. Most of the time, I was alone, untethered, and completely unaware of what it felt like to truly belong.
But standing here now, arms wrapped around these girls, feeling Annabelle’s arms around me… it hits me in my chest. For the first time in my life, I understand what family feels like. Warm. Safe.
Whole.
38
Hayes
Now
When Rowdy, Bailey, Josh, James, Charlotte, Aiden, and I step out of the chauffeured limo, the camera lights are blinding. Some album release parties are low-key affairs, but that is not the case for Outlaw’sAlcohol and Orgasmsrelease party. M&M Records is shelling out big bucks to make this event quite the spectacle.
I even wore my nicest pair of jeans.
I work my way down the line of media, smiling for photographs and answering questions about the album, the band, and our future plans. Toward the end of the line, I spot Annabelle’s co-worker, Dave. Country music relies heavily on radio for its success, so radio representatives are treated like VIPs within the industry.
“Dave, good to see you again.” I shake his hand and shoot him a friendly smile. And I hope that my territorial asshole routine outside of his rent house a few weeks ago won’t come back to bite me in the ass.
“You too, Ruston.” Dave drops my hand and tilts his head, assessing me. “Did you bring a date with you tonight?”
“Not tonight, no,” I laugh easily, playing my part, but his question sets me on edge. It’s obvious that he’s fishing for information. I don’t want to share anything about Annabelle or our relationship with a member of the press, but I also don’t want Dave to think that we aren’t a couple. So, I elaborate just a little. “I’m flying solo tonight because she’s not ready to be in the press just yet.”
Of course, I invited Annabelle, but after we discussed it further, she wasn’t ready to go public, and I don’t blame her. Her life, and the girls’ lives, will be easier without the interference and scrutiny of the media. We’ll go public in our own time, and I’d like to control the narrative as much as possible when we do.
What I do not want to happen is for Dave to break the news to the world that I’m dating Annabelle Morris, a widowed mother with two children whose husband worked at my record label. Breaking a story like that could make his career… and make Annabelle’s life much harder.
I feel like I’m walking a tightrope, and I hope that I didn’t just make a mistake by telling Dave what I did.
“Good, I’m glad y’all are keeping things private, for her sake,” Dave smiles. “So, let’s talk about the new album. Any plans for a tour yet?”
And just like that, my opinion of Annabelle’s co-worker shoots through the roof. I still think he may harbor romantic feelings for her, but I respect a man who will set aside his feelings and do what’s best for someone else.
Once I make it inside the venue and have a beer in hand, I take a moment to look around. The open-concept live music venue is owned by another popular country musician, and it’s decorated like an upscale honkytonk with exposed wooden beams, whiskey barrels that serve as cocktail tables, and neon beer signs that light up the walls of the cavernous space.
The listening session has already started, so the sounds ofAlcohol and Orgasmsare piped throughout the place. Some attendees are paying close attention to the music, while others stand in small groups quietly chatting and networking.
A release party is both a celebration and a strategic business event to garner publicity for the album. The people attending tonight include members of the press, record label executives, celebrities, influencers, our fellow labelmates, industry insiders, loyal fans, and contest winners. Charlotte has coordinated a social media team to promote a branded hashtag campaign, so even inside the venue, there are cameras everywhere as guests post photos and videos from the event all over Instagram and TikTok.
Before someone else drags me into conversation, I sidle up to Rowdy. “Any jitters?”
His head tilts back and forth. “There are always jitters the first time people get to hear the full album. Especially since we have to watch their reactions in real time. You?”
“Same. I don’t mind it so much until I look over at the music journalists sitting at the tables, feverishly jotting down notes. Hope to hell they’re writing down good shit, you know?”
Since Rowdy and I co-wrote the songs on the album, the critics’ opinions matter more to us than they do to Josh and James. I fucking splayed open my heart while writing these lyrics, so it’ll be difficult not to take the reviews personally.
Rowdy laughs. “I feel you, brother.”
“The dude that offered Annabelle his rent house is here. He asked if she was with me tonight.”
Rowdy whistles. “Shit. Is he gonna say anything?”
I shake my head. “Don’t think so. He seemed cool about it. I might even offer him another interview as my way of saying thanks for keeping his mouth shut.”
