Quinn
Sparrowtoldmewherethe place was before they left. Spectra and Sam—and some of the other mages—finished fixing up Beyond the Veil a couple of days ago, and they’re planning a grand re-opening, which has led to more arguments than I’d like.
They’re kind of part of our pack now, I think. I don’t mind that much. I don’t have a problem with the fae.
But Sparrow… Theyknow. And that terrified me at first. I hid in my flat for a couple of days, then in my room when Drew made it clear he wasn’t going to leave me alone.
They all think I’m sad, and there’s that, but I’m scared too, mostly because of the secret I’ve been hiding.
A fae stands at the end of the alley, eyes narrowing when I approach. Her nostrils flare, nose ring glinting in the streetlights. She’s even taller and broader than Drew is, and I don’t know whatkindof fae she is, but at least I can still smell that she is one.
“You’re in the wrong place, little wolf.” Some of the panic recedes when she says that because I like that she knows what I am.
“No, I-I was told to come here.”
“You know what’s down there?” She points over her shoulder with her thumb. The alley is dark, impossibly so. Even a human should be able to make out shapes with the streetlights so close, but it’s pitch black, and my stomach twists again.
“Yes. Somewhere to fight.”
She studies me more closely when I say that. Sparrow came to me after my would-be challenge, after the crai reappeared and he and the Wild Hunt stopped a fae. They already knew what I was hiding, but they understood, too, that I need to take control of it.
Vince’s classes—learning self-defence and how to fight vampires and mages—are fine. I just don’t need them. I didn’t train as hard as Kieran and Drew did, their dad pushing them more than anyone else, but we all did train, and I know how to kill a vampire just as well as they do.
No. What I fear is this.
I cannot shift.
I cannot feel my wolf.
I know that side of myself is still there. I am not like Kieran, who has never had a wolf but has some of our strengths, including his ability to be alpha of a pack and bond with a mate. No, Ihada wolf. But I have been so badly hurt and scared that he’s hiding, deep within me, and I don’t know how to get him back out.
And I don’t know how the others can help me, either. I don’t know of anyone who’s experienced this before, and if the answer is that nothing can be done…
I’d rather not know at all than be certain of that. The thought of it makes me feel sick.
“They may well kill you.”
I needsomething. And I have to be so careful, too, because the entire city knows what I’ve done, so being small and scared helps protect my pack, but the other secret I have is that beneath the fear and sadness there is all this anger, and that’s what Sparrow saw before they even saw that I can no longer call my wolf.
I’m angry all the time. At everyone. Exhaustively so, and who can help me with that?
This. This can help me. The fae are powerful, and this is entertainment, sure, but I’m sure it will be more brutal than any challenge I might have to face. It’s what I need.
“They won’t,” I say, and she snorts but doesn’t push the point.
“Go on then.”
She steps aside, and I angle my body to slip past her and into the alley. The darkness surrounds me, oppressively heavy, and I flex and stretch my fingers as I take a few uncertain steps forward. It must be a glamour, but Sparrow didn’t warn me of this, and what if it’s all a trap in the end?
No, they wouldn’t do that. I know they and Spectra are grateful for our help, even if the wards wouldn’t have held if Meilyr had come for us. But they can’t lie.
I frown. I never asked if it would be a trap, I suppose. Doesn’t matter. I’m already here.
A few more shuffling steps, and just as I’m about to turn on my heel and walk back, trying not to consider the possibility that I could be trapped in this deep, claustrophobic darkness forever, I step onto a tiled floor and find myself in a centre of a bar.
I blink in the low lights, making out the sign hanging over the bar. Mischief & Mayhem. Some fae turn their heads in my direction, but most attention is directed to another room, darker than this one, where I can hear grunts and the sound of blows. My first step forward is a little unsteady, but then I reach the doorway and push my way through the crowd, trying to get a better look.
There is a large cage in this room, which is far bigger than it should be. That thought makes me lightheaded, so I push it aside. Fae magic. That’s hardly my problem.
