The tray of food on the bed makes me smile even wider. It’s full of tili wafers and hot stew, no sticks and leaves in sight. There’s a still-steaming cup of nomo, too.
I comm Tamira while I drink my hot tea. She takes a while to answer, and when she finally does, it’s with squinty eyes and messy curls.
“Guess what!” I burst out, clutching my mug in both hands. “You were right.”
She yawns and stretches. “About what?”
“Did I wake you up? Sorry.” I grimace, but I can’t hold in my news. “You were right about Nik. I’m his Alara.”
Her drowsy lids pop open. “Oh my god, he told finally told you?! I’m so glad. Fen wasn’t sure he would, and it was killing me when I found out yesterday. Did you bang yet?”
A laugh pops out of me even though I’m a little annoyed she knew what was going on before I did. I guess it’s not too surprising that Nik talked to his brother about it. “Yeah, kinda.”
“How do youkindabang?” Tamira plops down on a stool in front of the comm screen and adjusts the wrap on her sveli.
I’m surprised at the flood of loyalty I feel toward Nik at her question. I don’t want to spill all his business without asking himfirst. But I’m also dying to tellsomeonehow amazing it was. “We did stuff, but we’re taking it slow because...how do I say this? Hewaitedfor me, Tam.”
“Oh.Oh, wow.So what are you dealing with? Is it an awkward-and-shy situation or like a pent-up-and-feral situation?”
“The last one.” I squeeze my eyes shut and my thighs together at the memory. “I let him bite me.”
Tamira squeals. “Not gonna lie, that’s hot. ItoldFen that there’s a beast inside that one. He swore up and down that Nik was just boring and grumpy, but I remember how he grabbed you when he thought you and Fen were together. He waswild. I didn’t understand why he lost his shit over that rumor, but now it all makes sense.”
“Yeah. Jealousy. It’s...a lot,” I admit. “Nik isn’t what I expected. He’s not who I would have picked for myself. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’d do him any day of the week. He’s got an ass like damn. He’s just not like guys I’ve dated before. They wanted to have brunch and play with their dog at the park, you know? Nik is not that guy. He’s not boyfriend material.”
She nods slowly. “He’s king material.”
“Yeah. That’s a good way to put it.” I shift, setting down my nomo so I can pull a fur over my lap. “I don’t know if I can live up to his standards. He sacrifices so much to be a good leader. He puts everyone before himself.”
“You deserve that kind of man.” Why is she looking at me like that? “You do, Delphie. You might not see it, but you’re a lot like him.”
“I am not!” I protest, laughing.
“You one hundred percent are, it’s just that he’s grumpy about it and you’re always trying to see the bright side. All you both do is help other people. What was your job on Earth?” she asks, knowing full well the answer. I worked sixty-hour weekscounseling veterans who’d been through the worst of what humanity has to offer.
“Point taken.”
But Tamira doesn’t let up. “What did you do for your family?”
“Took care of my grandparents until they died,” I mumble.
“What did you do for Jaya, when you could have gone back to Earth on the cushy Xaszian ship with the hot bee guys waiting on you hand and foot?”
I sigh. “Stayed to make sure she was okay. And before you say it, I spent all my time on Olethia looking for you and Lena. I know.”
“Yeah. You were on the best resort planet in the galaxy, and you didn’t even do anything fun.”
“I had fun! I went to like sixty different pleasure houses. That was fun.” I grin at her, but the truth of what she’s saying gnaws at me. I really haven’t done anything for myself...ever. Every choice has been about what’s best for other people. Maybe Nik and Iaremore alike than I realized.
Something in me rebels at the thought. “My search was just temporary, though. Once I found you guys, I was going to take off and do some sightseeing. But now? Guess not.” I shrug and wash away the lump in my throat with more nomo.
I have a feeling Nik does not go sightseeing. He goes on missions but otherwise stays on Usuri because he feels obligated to be here. That’s the whole reason he was trying to keep me away, so I wouldn’t get stuck here, too. I joked with him that we don’t have to stay, but I think on some level, hewantsto be here. It makes him happy to protect other people, to teach them. Take care of them.
If I’m completely honest with myself, I like helping people, too. I like being part of something bigger, the way my parents and brothers were a part of something when they served in themilitary. I know I could do a lot of good here. It’s just not what I would have picked.
“Give him a chance,” Tamira says softly, studying my face. “The mates thing is...really special. More than I would have ever asked for.”
I nod. “I will. I like him.”
