How are we late? We came here exactly when they told us to, in the car they booked for us.
‘I guess?’ Ethan calls back.
I hook my arm with his as we approach.
‘Ethan, no matter what I say, do your worst,’ I tell him. ‘Even if it seems like I’m chickening out – because I always soften, and then they always do something that makes me wish I hadn’t.’
‘It would be my pleasure,’ he replies.
It turns out that the place you board a boat to dinner is like a snap from a Sydney postcard. At first it’s a slow reveal – blink and you’ll miss it – and then it’s there, all at once, Sydney Opera House, and the Sydney Harbour Bridge, and they’re somehow bigger than I imagined them, although that’s probably because I’ve only ever seen them in photos or videos.
‘Dinner on a boat,’ he whispers to me, nudging me with his elbow.
Boat feels like a very small word for a very big yacht. God, it does look inviting though. The buzz of activity, the pretty lights, the unreal backdrop. The only thing that could ruin it really is the people – and you know they’re going to give it their best.
‘Do you know all of these people?’ Ethan asks as we walk along the gangway to board the yacht.
‘I know as many people as you do,’ I tell him. ‘Actually, no, that’s not true. There’s the chief bridesmaid, Eleanor, and cousin Tiggy should be here somewhere.’
‘Do we like either of them?’ he checks.
‘Eleanor, no, she’s a supervillain,’ I tell him, in no way exaggerating. ‘Tiggy, we love. Don’t get me wrong, she’s as bourgeoisie as the rest of them. She’s a boarding-school brat, she’s never worked a day in her life, and she’s probably had to leave a holiday for this holiday. But she’s actually nice. She loves a drink and a dance and a roll around with a “working man” – so watch your back. It is, of course, fine for Tiggy to be a party girl because she’s on a champagne budget.’
‘You’ve got to love that double standard,’ he says.
Now that we’re on board – the two late ones – the gangway comes away from the yacht. There’s no turning back now,we’re trapped. I supposed there’s always jumping overboard but hopefully it won’t come to that.
‘Welcome drinks,’ a server says, presenting us with a silver platter loaded with various cocktails. He’s wearing a black tuxedo which I think is funny, because if this were the wedding then he would look like a guest. Not on a boat though, on a boat it’s (very) smart casual.
I’m wearing a navy strapless midi dress with silver accessories – yes, silver, not white gold or platinum, which to this lot is as bad as turning up in clown make-up. Ethan, accidentally, is almost perfectly coordinated with me. He’s wearing a navy suit with a crisp white shirt unbuttoned at the collar. He looks seriously fit in a suit, like he should be in an advert for aftershave – a suit which he assures me he already had in his suitcase, just in case, but I’m not sure I believe him.
I take a drink from the tray. Ethan takes two.
The server doesn’t bat an eyelid – he’s either not being paid enough to care, or being paid more than enough to let everyone do whatever they want.
‘You made it then,’ Bea says as she greets us. She’s wearing a cream twinset – very Queen Camilla chic – while Dad wears a dark green suit.
‘Ethan,’ Dad greets him. ‘How about you and I take a stroll, have a chat?’
Tell me my dad isn’t dad-ing right now!
‘Yeah, okay, cool,’ Ethan says.
He polishes off one drink, so that he only has one to carry.
‘I like to get blotto at these things too,’ Dad tells him as they walk off.
Unbelievable. So, apparently it’s fine for men to drink too much.
‘Best behaviour tonight, Lana,’ Bea warns me. ‘Remember what we talked about.’
Ha. I remember. It’s the main thing that’s motivating me right now.
Finally alone, I knock back my drink.
Normally I’d worry about a boy talking to my dad – or more specifically my dad talking to a boy – but with Ethan I have nothing to lose. Not just because we’re not a real couple but because, well, the worse the conversation goes, the better it is for what I’m going for.
I walk across the deck, running a hand along the gleaming silver railings. It isn’t the only thing that’s glittering – everyone here is dolled up to the eyes, in their diamonds and expensive watches. Everyone is catching the light.
