‘Ihave.’
‘Because I can always re-arrange if you’dprefer.’
His mum laughed. ‘Go!’shesaid.
Dan gave her another kiss, then left the room, and headed out to the car. With one hand on the vehicle door handle, he looked back at the house, half tempted not to go out at all. He felt guilty about leaving his mum at home alone. What if something happened? Not that he really had a choice. Thanks to his track record, it wouldn’t matter if it was for her benefit or not. She’d only accuse him of making yet moreexcuses.
Dan reassured himself in the knowledge that he’d promised to be back in a couple of hours and readied himself for the night ahead. He took a deep breath and finally let himself into the car. After settling into the driving seat, he turned the key in the ignition, repeatedly insisting to himself that he didn’t have to do this, he wanted to do it. He put the vehicle into gear, at the same time, he recalled what his mother had said. He let out a little laugh. The woman always did make a lot of sense. This time, it was her words about making the best of the cards they’d been dealt that had struck a chord; and feeling determined, that’s exactly what Dan plannedtodo.
As he set off down the road, he thought about what lay ahead. Life might still feel daunting, but at least he’d come to a decision. In a funny sort of way, getting to this point had been the difficult bit. Now he had clarity and couldfocus.
He wondered if Maeve would notice a difference in him now he felt ready to commit. He hoped so. After all, in the time they’d spent together she’d made it more than clear that she saw they had a future. Yes, she understood his concerns and yes, she’d have liked to have met him under different circumstances, but who wouldn’t? He, himself, had wished the same thing. He, again, insisted he’d come to the right conclusion and while his heart might not have embraced Maeve just yet, he felt sure given a bit more time that wouldchange.
He tried to picture the two of them a few years into the future. Would they be genuinely happy? Would they have the perfect two-point-four family unit? He obviously hadn’t had enough sleep as his brain began playing tricks. In his mind’s eye, Maeve kept morphing into Annabel, an image he didn’t want. ‘Like that’s ever going to happen,’hesaid.
Forced to shake himself free, Dan knew there was no point going there. Thanks to his soul searching, he may have realised that’s what he secretly hoped, but in reality Annabel could never be the woman for him. In the last twenty-four hours, she’d gone from beingjustlike his mum totoo muchlike his mum and, even if he’d wanted to, there was no way he could compete with aghost.
He’d always wondered why there’d never been another man in his mother’s life. However, thanks to their heart-to-heart, he finally understood. His mum had remained so emotionally connected to his dad for all of these years that she simply hadn’t been able to move on. So much so, she now seemed to be giving up on life for him. Just like Annabel couldn’t move on from her deceased husband, he acknowledged, although to be fair to her, she had made it clear from the start she was only after one thing –ababy.
He thought about the night the two of them had almost kissed and, despite his better judgement, he couldn’t help but question whether things would have been different had their lips actually met. Would he be on his way to see her now instead of Maeve? He doubted it and again told himself it would be silly to think otherwise. If they had kissed, she’d have probably refused to see him again, putting paid to their agreement, which in the long run he supposed would have been for the best. Even an idiot could see that, if he and Maeve were to have any real chance, he had to stop all contact with Annabel. He sighed at his own stupidity. Even an idiot could see he should never have agreed to father Annabel’s child tobeginwith.
‘No, you’ve made the right decision,’ he insisted. ‘It’s time tomoveon.’
He might not have relished the prospect of letting Annabel down, but it had to be done; and sooner rather than later, he realised, for both their sakes. He checked his watch and calculated how much time he had before his date with Maeve. With enough to spare, he told himself there was no point delaying the inevitable. He turned the steering wheel and began making a U-turn in the road. If he was quick, he could get it over and done with, ready to move on with the rest ofhislife.
* * *
Annabel turned on the taps,and looking forward to a good, long soak, added a measure of bubble bath to the water. She felt tired and her body ached. After an early start, she’d spent most of the day on her feet, putting together the arrangements for the young couple’s wedding. Thankfully, the bride loved them, especially her bouquet, a mix of raspberry redDarcy Roses,Red GerberasandBurgundy Calla Lilies. All of them symbolising love and loyalty in one way or another, perfect for their big day. She smiled, as she recalled the young woman’s appreciative, verging on tearful response; a job well done inanyone’sbook.
Annabel grabbed a hair band and secured her hair in place. With the bath tub almost full, she turned off the taps and slipped out of her dressing gown. The water felt hot against her skin as she climbed in and bubbles frothed and fizzed around her ears when she leaned back. She could feel the day’s physical stresses and strains immediately start to leave her body. ‘Heavenly,’ she said. Lying there, she closed her eyes. Now she just had to wait for her brain to relax as much as hermuscles.
With everything that had been happening lately, switching off mentally seemed easier said than done. Of course, being worried about her sister didn’t help; if only she could get a hold of her. She hadn’t heard from Rebecca since the night that she had disclosed the news of Gavin’s infidelity; and she wondered if she should try calling again. Or she could ring the man himself? He’d definitely know what wasgoingon.
Annabel felt a bit out of her depth and didn’t know what to do for the best. Contacting Gavin might create more harm than good, particularly if her sister hadn’t confronted him yet. Having left her numerous messages already, she supposed one more wouldn’t hurt. She just hoped Rebecca didn’t do anything stupid in the meantime. Annabel shook the thought from her head. Her sister was far too sensible a woman for that. She probably just needed time on her own to consider her next move. Plus, her sister would never do anything to hurt the baby she wascarrying.
Annabel sighed, wishing more than anything that she could bepregnanttoo.
Laid there amongst the bubbles, she considered whether or not to ask Dan if he minded upping their weekly appointment. But with the man having so much on his plate already she decided she couldn’t be that selfish. It would mean taking him away from his mum and time with her had to be getting more and more precious.Poor Dan,she thought. It must be unbearable to watch someone fade away like that while knowing there isn’t a thing anyone can doaboutit.
She pulled herself up into a seated position and picked up the soap, simultaneously wondering how his search for a wife was getting on. When she pictured him on his dinner date at the restaurant, she recalled the woman’s appearance – perfect make up, hair to die for, and legs up to her armpits. As she slowly spun the soap around in her hands, Annabel found herself curious. Was this womanThe OneDan had been looking for? Probably not, she decided. The woman was clearly all window dressing and nosubstance.
She paused and asked herself where this resentment for a total stranger had come from. Anyone would think she was jealous. ‘Now you’re just being stupid,’ she said. She began lathering faster and faster. ‘Jealous,myarse.’
Annabel dismissed the very idea and began to scrub herself clean. However, the sound of the doorbell ringing stopped her in her tracks. She realised it could only be Rebecca and hastily ducked her body under the water in a quick rinse, before climbing out of the bath. She put on her dressing gown, but didn’t even bother drying herself first. Instead, she simply paddled out of the room and quickly made her way down the stairs, ready to find out why her sister had been so elusive these last few days. ‘Thank God,’ she said, unlocking the front door and swinging it open. ‘I wasbeginningto… .’
Annabel fell silent, surprised to find Dan standing there instead. Obviously on his way out for the evening, the man looked very dapper indeed. She cringed, unable to say the same about herself.Does this man ever think to ring ahead?she silentlyasked.
After telling herself the little somersaults in her tummy were the result of embarrassment, she watched his eyes widen at the sight of her and, realising that’s how bad she looked, she blushed. She pulled her dressing gown tight over her chest, at the same time wishing its hemline sat below the knee andnotover.
‘It’s not a bad time, is it?’askedDan.
Annabel gingerly put a hand up to the messy pile of hair on her head, conscious of the bathwater still running down her legs. ‘Erm, no,’ she replied. ‘I wouldn’t say thatexactly.’
He seemed to be waiting for her to saysomethingelse.
‘Oh, sorry,’ she said. All at once remembering herself she stood aside. ‘Please, come in. Just let me go and throw someclotheson.’
Annabel raced back up the stairs and into her bedroom and grabbed the first clean items to hand. ‘There’s no point worrying about what you look like now,’ she said. She donned a set of fleecy pyjamas and a pair of fluffy bunny slippers.The man has just seen you half-naked. She caught sight of her reflection in the dressing table mirror and stopped to look at herself. ‘I bet his lady friend couldn’t carry this off,’ she insisted. Her shoulders slumped. ‘Then again, would shewantto?’
