I press my body against hers, wrapping her up from behind and placing a kiss on her shoulder. “Good morning, Firefly. Are you excited for today?”
Mack turns her head and kisses me quickly. “Yes. I’m ready to be actively helping instead of simply learning about it.”
Right after we renewed our vows, Mack sat me down and asked if we could discuss the possibility of her going back to school to become a victims’ advocate. I was immediately on board. She quit her job and started taking shifts at Great and Spacious again for some extra cash. She enrolled in online classes that fall. Today is her graduation, and she’ll be working with the city as a victims’ advocate.
Harper and Kinsley decided to attend the university in Logan to study music and bio science. It’s been weird not having them at the house all the time, but it’s also been nice to be able to fuck Mack wherever and whenever I want.
The twins are driving down today to celebrate Mack’s graduation. All of my siblings, their partners, Hannah and Morgan, Lizzie and Enoch, and Joanna will be there to cheer my wife on as she walks across the stage.
“Have I told you how proud I am?” I murmur against her head.
“Only a few hundred times.”
“That’s not enough, Firefly. It should be in the thousands.”
I step back to turn the coffee machine on, then help Mack plate our eggs-in-the-hole. When the coffee is done brewing, I fix hers with caramel syrup and a splash of heavy cream, and mine with white chocolate creamer. It took a while to find a coffee combo I like, but now it’s a daily occurrence.
I officially removed my records six months after we got married, and life has been blissful. Not carrying around the weight of the church’s expectations and rules has given me room to grow in ways I never thought I would.
To my shock, Lauren asked me to go to lunch one day and peppered me with questions about leaving. Ultimately, she decided to remove her records, too. She came out as a lesbian shortly after and is now living with her wife in Colorado teaching music. Lacey removed her records as soon as she turned eighteen.
Thomas and Tim don’t understand why, but maybe someday they will. My parents were a little hurt when my sisters made the choice to leave, but they haven't treated them any differently. Lauren’s wife was welcomed with open arms and fits in perfectly with our family.
My parents have made a point to not talk about church related stuff with us. It’s difficult for them to know most of their kids won’t be with them in the heaven they believe in, but I’m proud of them for trying to make sure we still feel welcome in this life.
Mack and the twins’ relationship has flourished in the last few years. Kinsley dominated every science fair project she entered, taking state and even placing at nationals. Her hard work opened every opportunity for her, and she had her pick of colleges, but she still chose to stay close to us and Harper.
Life has been full of laughter, love, and light over the last four years. I never realized life outside of the church could be this way, since we’re taught the opposite. We’re told people who leave are unhappy and directionless; they just want to sin without consequences, or they didn’t try hard enough to understand the gospel.
I can say with one hundred percent certainty they’re lying.
Looking at how far my cousins and I have come after leaving is proof happiness doesn't have to be found in organized religion. Happiness comes from living an authentic life filled with love—both romantic and platonic.
Happiness can come from enjoying a cup of coffee or a mimosa at brunch on a Sunday. From enjoying the sting of a tattoo needle etching artwork into your skin.
For some, happiness comes from having adventurous, kinky sex. Others find joy in raising their kids without the pressure of the rules of the church. Some people find peace in knowing they get to choose whether or not they have kids at all.
I’ll forever be grateful for running into Mack on that chilly winter day. I’m grateful she said yes to being my wife, even if the reasons for it were slightly unhinged.
My life is brighter with my Firefly in it, and it’s only going to continue to improve. Sure, we’ve facedchallenges, and we’ll continue to do so, but choosing her and choosing my own forever outside of the church will always be the best thing I’ve ever done.
THE END
