“And there were no sparks! You, Sir FlirtsALot have never even flirted with me.”
I scoff back, “A man knows his weight class, love.” Her jaw drops and I realize I’ve said something terribly wrong. “What?” She crosses her arms, like, like she’s suddenly self conscious? Shit! “No! Not your weight I meant weight class like a boxer or a wrestler? I meant I know when a woman is out of my league!”
She rolls her gorgeous eyes and takes on a childish, sarcastic tone, “Uh, yeah, okay.”
“Tell me, honestly, if I’d so much as tried to dance with you at my brother’s wedding, you’d have said?” I wait for her to answer. She doesn’t. “Something along the lines of ‘Piss off Sir FlirtsALot,’ I assume.”
She cocks her head, considering it.
“I’m spot on, eh?” I go on. “I saw the other blokes try to flirt with you and you shot down every single one like a sniper, scope trained straight on their balls. I quite like my balls intact.” She looks at me, still trying to decide how right I am. Then I see something pass over her, doubt? Sadness? “Why…why was that? Is it all men or just me?”
She takes a sip of wine. “Have you ever been in a relationship?”
I dip my chin, “Of course.”
“I mean, a serious one. Not a couple weeks. A partnership you thought might go the distance. Like you might marry them.” I shake my head, since I haven’t. She says, “Well, I have. It ended right before the marrying part and how it ended, it…I…”
“Are you still in love with him?” I ask.
“Theo? No,” she says quickly but it’s not convincing. So she must still be. And for some reason I find myself deeply disappointed by this news.
I try to sound sure as I barrel onward with this plan, “Well, that was a couple years ago now, right? You’ve moved on. In fact, we should text the group.”
Her eyes threaten to bulge out of her pretty head. “What! No.”
“Yes, we send a selfie. I can…Oh! I ask my sister-in-law for advice! Samantha loves you, she loves me. She’ll be so excited she’ll handle convincing Skye for you. We can grease the wheels now and then send them some Vegas wedding pics.”
“Are you unwell, Bossman? Are you crazy? This is crazy. You’re crazy. Excuse me? Check please?” She says to no one, since not a single server is nearby. She’s coming a little bit unglued and I find it a little bit adorable.
“Janie,” I put a hand on her forearm. “I need your help. You need my help. This is twelve months we’re talking about. And only these first few really count. After the first of the year I’ll have fulfilled the stipulations. It’ll be hard for Dad to do much after that as long as we make some appearances and stay married on paper the rest of the five years.”
“What about you?” she says softly.
“What d’you mean?”
She frowns, “I’m not trying to be rude, I’m really not, but no one is going to believe you went from threesomes—” she does the lean-whisper thing again.Don’t look at her cleavage, mate. Don’t do it!“You know, like you were havinglast night—to suddenly settling down with some nobody from Juniper Falls.” I start to say they will when that nobody is as gorgeous as she is but she carries on. “Not to mention you’ll have to actually settle down? You can’t pretend to be married and be, um, showing up the next morning in last night’s suit anymore, you know?”
“Possessive already, are we?” I tease.
“Would you cut it out? Everything is not a joke, Benedict!”
“Ben.”
“Mr. Clark.”
“Ben.”
“Boss.”I sigh. She does too. “Sorry, but youaremy boss. Youdohave a reputation. No one is going to—”
I lean forward this time to cut her off, “I haven’t shagged anyone in weeks.” I think back. “No, over a month, including last night.”
Her mouth falls open and then she recovers with a joke, “However have you survived?”
“Just barely,” I joke back.
Her smile turns to confusion, “Not that I care, but, why?”
I look at the posh lighting overhead and think about it. “I suppose it’s what I told you, being bored of the same ol’ same ol’. How women are with me. What they wantfromme. Everyone signs an NDA, of course, but—”
