“Ben!” Janelle says.
“Oh, his knob works,” Samantha wags her eyebrows.
“Gross!” I grimace.
“You started it!” Samantha calls back.
“Children.” Mum says.
Janelle turns to Samantha, “Speaking of, where are your munchkins?”
“Since Abby and Layla stayed in with Layla’s mom, and it was so close to bedtime, we left the boys there too,” my sister-in-law replies.
“Aw, I was pumped to finally meet them in person. They need to see my face outside of a phone screen,” she says to Samantha.
I suddenly remember again how embedded she already is into the family. Emerson and Samantha adopted twin four-year-old boys months ago, but of course, Janelle has already spoken to them. At the same moment, I can feel my twin studying me across the room and, worse still, I can see Mum studying Janelle. My pulse starts to speed up and my hands grow clammy.
Maybe wifey was right to be nervous. We’re not convincing voyeurs on the internet. This is family. They know me, and many of them already know Janelle.
“There they are,” my father’s voice cuts through my thoughts.
Showtime.
“Dad, this is Janelle Rae Rowland,” I say as he approaches us. Samantha squeaks behind us, probably because I used her full name.
“Soon to be Clark,” Janelle flashes a look at me that screamsget it together. Indeed.“Haven’t had a chance to change it yet. And you can call me Janie.”
“Janie. Nice to meet the woman who finally hammered some nails into this boy’s feet.”
Byron laughs awkwardly.
Emerson grimaces and mutters, “Wow, lovely imagery, Dad.”
Mum tenses.
“You mean she keeps him grounded! Finally settling down, you know,” Samantha says quickly, trying to make things a little less awkward.
“This wanker? Grounded?” Byron piles on.
“Finally getting smart about his life,” Dad carries on.
I wave off the tension, smiling at Mum, “Ah, you all know I’m too bloody handsome to be smart. Would be criminal.” My father and brother mutter in annoyance, but the women all exhale in relief. “Shall we eat or is tonight just drinks and talking about my limitless charm.”
“Aaaand there it is,” Samantha laughs.
I look at my wife, expecting that kind of comment-eye-roll-combo to come from her. But she’s frozen, her eyes narrowed at me. I reach out for her hand, “Come, my darling, let’s get enough alcohol to make it through having to look at his awful mug all dinner, yeah?”
“I’m your twin, asshole,” he huffs as we walk through the living area to a grand dining room lined with windows that show a stellar view of Central Park.
“The ugly twin. You’ve gone all pudgy.” I smile but I’m purposely pushing his buttons, since he always sides with our father about everything.
“Just wait, you’re married now. Your dad bod cometh, brother.”
“Wait, are you guys going to have kids? How many?!” Samantha chimes in from behind us. I think I hear my older brother chastise her quietly. “Sorry! Inside thoughts! Personal question!”
I glance down at Janelle’s face, ready to intervene.
But she squeezes my hand and says, “It’s okay, Sam. We’re in no rush, just having a lot of fun right now.”
