I turned from them without a word and walked away.
5
The daysin Hyrall slipped past in a blur. For the first time since arriving, I found myself wishing time would slow, if only a little. Just yesterday, I’d hidden away two more servings of dried rations in the drawer of my armoire. But despite every small step I took, my plan still felt like a distant illusion. It was too fragile, too far from reach.
Restless, I twirled the latest scroll between my fingers, the crimson tassel fluttering. My brows drew together as I stared through the window of my bedchamber, lost in thought.
It was still midday.
For the first time in months, Gadriel had summoned me before nightfall. And though I had no reason to be, I was nervous. I had spent the past week asking him, again and again, to take me with him to Torhiel. Every time, the answer was the same: No.
Still, I asked. Even last night, curled beside him after an intimate service, I tried again, quietly, carefully. But even then, wrapped in his arms, the answer hadn’t changed.
“Gadriel,” I said. “Please… take me with you.”
He exhaled. “You already know my answer, Odessa.”
“Then help me understand,” I insisted. “Why do you keep refusing me?”
His jaw tensed, a muscle feathering in his cheek. “You press harder than is wise, even for you.”
I swallowed. “As your consort, my safety shouldn’t be your concern. My duty to you should be the only thing that matters.”
He didn’t answer. Silence hung between us.
“Six months without me beside you at night,” I continued. “I imagine that will be… difficult.”
Gadriel shook his head. “You’re repeating yourself, Odessa.”
“No other woman can fulfill you the way I do.”
Gadriel sighed. “Even if that were true, my answer wouldn’t change.”
I sat up slowly, leaning on one hand. My raven hair slipped over my bare shoulders and spilled down my back.
“Have I not served you well this past year, Gadriel?” My fingers traced lightly across his chest. “Have I ever failed my duties, night after night?”
His expression remained blank.
“I understand that what we have is not love?—”
“It’s not,” Gadriel interrupted.
“—but it is something of value.”
He looked at me like I’d lost my mind.
Still, I pressed on. “I won’t stop trying. Take me with you, Gadriel. Six months without you…” My words faltered. “I wouldn’t know what to do. As it stands, my days are nothing but waiting for your call.”
I lowered my gaze.
“If you bring me, I’ll do whatever you ask. Please, Gadriel. If you return and I’m no longer needed,” I paused, “I don’t know what I’d do.”
It was a dangerous edge to walk, treading the line between desperation and devotion. It could play out one of two ways: Gadriel could take offense by my brazenness, or my desire could flatterhis ego.
But for once, his expression revealed nothing. Normally, I could read his moods with ease. Now, I was left uncertain.
After a long pause, Gadriel spoke.
