He should not have raised the issue when he knew how much it upset her. How could she ever fulfill theonlyrequirement vital to becoming his duchess, the ability to produce an heir? He knew this and stubbornly refused to accept it.
His arms came around her and he hugged her to him as she struggled to regain her composure. “Three months, Rob? Why bother? You know there is no chance of my conceiving.” She emitted a ragged sigh, for every word carried a wealth of ache.
“We’ll see.”
“Stop, Rob. I know how protective you are of me, but not even you can fix this. Neither yourpotencynor your prowess in the bedchamber is going to fix me. No more talk about this, please. I need to pull myself together before I walk back into the ballroom.”
He regarded her with obvious reluctance. “All right, but do you really want to return inside?”
“It is almost midnight and they will soon ring the bell for supper.”
“Are you hungry?”
She gave a curt laugh. “Not in the least.”
“Shall I take you home?” He was being gentle with her again, as he always was. “Or have you brought your own carriage?”
She shook her head. “I came with Cherish and Gawain.”
She had never been happier than when Cherish had married Fiona’s cousin, Gawain, Duke of Bromleigh, one of theton’s notorious Silver Dukes until tamed by Cherish. Fiona was proud to have brought about their love match.
If only the same were possible for herself.
But she’d had her turn at marriage and harbored no regrets, for Shoreham had been a good husband on the whole. Theirs had never been a passionate love match, but a very good and caring friendship.
That made for a successful marriage, did it not?
“Let me find Bromleigh,” Rob said, his voice a deep rumble that flowed through her like warm honey. “I’ll let him know I am taking you home.”
“You needn’t.”
“I know, but do you want to remain at this party?”
She shook her head, feeling a sudden chill that sprang from her insides and not from the crisp night air surrounding them. “No.”
He placed her arm in his and led her inside, steering her through the crush and into the entry hall. He asked for his carriage to be brought around, and then turned to her. “Wait here. I’ll advise Bromleigh I am taking you home. I’ll be right back.”
She nodded, suddenly feeling quite alone even though footmen were scurrying all around her and some of the partygoers had spilled out of the ballroom into this front hall. She smiled at a few when they acknowledged her. Spoke briefly to one or two of them. But she always felt an emptiness when Robert Durham left her side, even now as he left briefly to convey a message to her cousin.
She hated this need for him, and how desperately her heart had grown to crave him.
In every other respect, she was capable, confident, and enjoyed her independence. She liked being in charge and managing her own assets, for her dear Shoreham had been generous in providing for her. She also liked meddling in other people’s affairs, especially when it came to romantic matters. She was very good at making love matches, Gawain and Cherish being perhaps her greatest achievement.
But this was why being around Rob unsettled her so much.
If such a thing as mates of the heart existed, he was hers.
And perhaps this was why she was sabotaging her own efforts to remarry, always choosing to flirt with clots like Lord Dexter because she could never take them seriously and would never be so foolish as to marry such a man.
There was only one man she wanted, and that was Robert Durham.
But he needed a wife who could produce an heir.
This failing in her might not have mattered had he a slew of siblings, namely brothers, or even male cousins who could have taken on the responsibility of siring Durham male heirs. But Rob was the last. The title would extinguish upon his death, leaving at risk all his remaining relatives, most of whom were elderly ladies and utterly dependent on him to maintain their genteel lives. He also had employees, tenants, servants, and so many others who were under his protection and needed this proud line to continue.
That he would choose her above all his duties overwhelmed and humbled her, but they both knew it was wrong.
Rob strode out of the ballroom and cast her a smile as he approached. “Gawain is duly advised. Let’s get you home.”
