She eyed him curiously. “Rob, you are always hungry.”
He grunted as he stared down at his empty plate. “Yes, usually. But not today.”
“Because our week is up,” she said with a nod.
“It doesn’t have to be, Fiona. Give us another chance.”
What was so special about the debutantes who would arrive at the Bromleigh house party for the sole purpose of catching his eye? Would they be so different from next year’s crop? Or those of the following year?
Fiona now had that stubborn look on her face. “You are only prolonging my misery. Do you think this is any easier for me? I am so sorry we remained friends into adulthood. Had I knownhow we would grow to feel about each other, I would have avoided you at all costs. At least you still have the hope of a family, so do not throw this away.”
She set down her fork with a clatter, for he had upset her once again.
“Fiona—”
“No! Can you not see how this is destroying me? You cannot continue to treat this matter so lightly, Rob.”
His eyes widened in surprise. “How can you accuse me of giving this situation no attention? It isallI think about, day and night.”
“Then stop thinking about it. Stop being unrealistic and stubborn.” A tear rolled down her cheek. “I would give anything for what is right there in front of you to grab. Children. A family. Stop treating this blessing that is within your reach as though it something you can casually grab at any time. It is not trivial. It iseverything, and you must never take it for granted.”
He had never looked less forward to a party. “All right. But I thinkourchance for happiness is just as important. I am taking none of it for granted. What I am doing is fighting to have all of this withyou. Believe me, it would be so much simpler for me if I did not love you to the depths of my soul.”
He took a deep breath and continued. “There is no sunlight without you. Nor moonlight to shimmer upon the gentle seas. There is no music, no flowers, no laughter. Nostarlight. None of it without you.”
She emitted a soft cry.
But he was not about to relent. “I want another three years with you, but I know you will never agree to it now. So I will only ask for the three days you still owe me, since our week was cut short.”
“Seriously? You are going to hold me to something that is natural to a woman’s body and completely out of my control?”
He was not a petty man and would never have quibbled were it not their future at stake. “Yes, I am. This was our bargain and I am entitled to three more days of your body.”
“Fine,” she said with a huff. “Then come back to me after Cherish’s house party is over. You shall have your bargain fulfilled, and then you must walk away. Youmust, Rob. The thought of our parting is already unbearable for me. I cannot think of what it will do to me if we were to part after years together.”
“I know,” he said softly.
“In the meanwhile, you must get to know the young ladies who will be at the house party. That you might come back to me to complete our bargain does not relieve you of the obligation to look for a proper wife.”
“All right,” he said, knowing she was deluding herself if she believed anyone but her would ever be a proper wife to him.
His heart was heavy as he packed his belongings and made ready to leave Fiona’s home later that afternoon to ride next door to Northam Hall. He realized the chunk of lapis lazuli stone was still in the drawer with his undergarments, so he tucked it in his pocket for now. He would give it to her upon his return to Shoreham Manor.
Fiona had promised she would ride to Northam Hall later today. “I have a few things to finish up here, since I will be staying with Cherish for the week. I think it is unnecessary for me to move in there, but I suppose she will not hear of my riding back and forth each day, even if our homes are on neighboring properties.”
Rob was grateful for that. “Did I not express the same concern? It is the only sensible thing to do.”
“I know. You’ve already warned me of the danger of returning home in the wee hours of the morning when highwaymen might be about.”
Rob climbed into his carriage. “I’ll be waiting for you at Northam Hall.”
“Don’t. I’ll get there in my own good time. You had better be paying attention to the young ladies hoping to meet you, or I shall kick you to Brighton and back,” she warned.
As the carriage rolled away from Fiona’s home, Rob eased back against the squabs and emitted a wrenching groan.
Why did his heart have to be so true to one woman? And why did that woman have to be Fiona?
Gawain and Cherish hurried out to greet him when he drew up to what had been Cherish’s home before she married Gawain. They had kept the house as their summer retreat and fixed it up after her vile uncle had practically destroyed it.
