“Stop myself?”
“Am I wrong?” I asked.
“You’re not,” Kieran stated. “And that’s his problem.”
“Shut up,” Casteel growled.
I looked between them. Was it? Possibly, but it wasn’t only that. I had messed up. I never should’ve asked Kieran—no, I’d needed to make sure someone knew when to step in. What I should’ve done was tell Casteel. I had ample time. And I nevershould’ve made Kieran keep it a secret from Cas. It didn’t matter that I thought I was protecting their relationship. Intentions meant so very little when things went wrong. It was something I knew.
But he also had to know his limits.
“It wasn’t easy for me to ask that of Kieran,” I told him, swallowing. “He didn’t want to agree. He wasn’t happy about it. And I shouldn’t have asked him not to tell you. I should’ve told you.” My chest ached. “I’m sorry, Cas. I’m so sorry. I never meant—” I squeezed my eyes shut, shaking my head as I turned away. I reopened my eyes to see that the sky had darkened beyond the balcony doors. “I never meant for you to feel this way. For me tomakeyou feel this way. I was wrong.” I whirled back around. “And I will spend the rest of my life making sure you know that.”
That muscle in his jaw was throbbing again as he looked away.
“But you’re also wrong.”
His gaze shot back to me.
“You need to recognize that you have limits for what you can and can’t do—limits that I love you even more for,” I said. “You need to stop…”
“Stop what?”
Part of me wanted to apologize again. Do and say whatever was needed for things to return to normal—if things could. And, gods, that thought didn’t just terrify me. It threatened to break me. But I needed to say this because this wasn’t only on me.
It wasn’t on him or Kieran.
It justwas.
“I know I’ve hurt you, and Ihate,”—my throat scratched with the force of that word—“that. I know I fucked up.”
“Poppy.” Kieran turned his head toward me.
“No. It’s true,” I said, meeting Casteel’s eyes. “And you need to stop lying to yourself.”
His lips parted.
“You cannot go with me tomorrow. This doesn’t change that.” I pressed my hands together. “Nor does it mean I don’t trust you. All it means is that I will not risk you—either of you.”
He turned sideways and stared at the wall for what felt like a small eternity. “You agree with this?”
“No,” Kieran answered. “But she’s right. Our presence will be a distraction, and neither of us will allow the Fates to harm her.”
Casteel’s jaw rolled as he shook his head. “That’s bullshit.”
“Cas,” Kieran said. “It’s what she meant about lying to yourself.”
His hands twitched at his sides as he turned back toward me. “You are risking yourself and demanding that I accept it.”
Blinking back tears, I said, “He won’t kill me.”
“You don’t know that!” he shouted, causing the glass in the room to rattle. “You have no idea what he feels now. The fucker has been entombed for how long? That’s a hell of a lot of thinking.” He thrust his hand through his hair. His fingers shook. “He tried to use you to seduce me. What man in love would do that?”
“You asked me that before, and my response is the same. Who the fuck knows why he does anything? He’s the one who fell in love with someone after seeing them pick flowers. He’s not exactly logical.”
“You’renot being logical,” Casteel snapped. “You’re just going off what others said.”
“He’s been watching us!” I yelled back. “Why else would he be doing that?”
