‘I am sorry,’ he said from behind her, sounding as though he meant it, though how could she ever be sure, with this man? ‘I had reason to know that, and it was never my intention to hurt you. That would be unconscionable in the circumstances. Sometimes, my humour is too dark for civilised company. I should have realised that my bitter jest, which I admit was not in the best of taste, would strike you in that manner and no other.’
‘How else could it strike me?’ She was furious suddenly; she turned to face him once more, wanting very badly to hit him, or at least to find some crack in his infuriating composure. ‘Good God, my “notorious fecundity”? Is my life nothing but a joke to you?’
‘It’s not a joke. Far from it.’ He sighed. ‘Viola, you know my situation, and I have an inkling about yours. Unlike Brummell, I am entirely serious. I thought we might help each other – build something lasting out of the ruins of the past. Make life easier for both of us, not just me. Keep the boys safe.’
She could not afford to dwell on the rest of it, however much it stung; this was the heart of the matter, or should be. ‘Have you any reason to think that they are not?’
‘You speak of my brother, I presume?’ At least she could depend on him to take her meaning, not beat about the bush and utter any sort of platitudes. That had never been his way.
She took a few restless steps away from him. ‘Edward warned me against him when he was dying, as you did too, long ago. I haven’t seen Mr Armstrong for many years – now that he is no longer the heir to Winterflood, he has no excuse to pay a visit. My only guests are my own family. I don’t know if it’s reasonable to fear him; I only know that Edward did, and it was not like him. I thought you might have a better idea of his state of mind, as his closest relative. I know you used to talk to him, at least occasionally.’
He grimaced and shook his head. ‘I’m not on visiting terms with him either these days. I have heard that he is drinking heavily and talking wildly – keeping low company, and ifIcall it low, believe me, my dear, it really is of the lowest. I can’t imagine my sudden elevation to the peerage has improved his temper one jot. Is he dangerous to your boys? I don’t know. I’d tell you if I did. I do know that dogs cringe from him, and horses, and he can’t keep servants. Being his younger half-brother was not an enjoyable experience until I grew big enough to fight back. It is fortunate for them and you that he is not your sons’ guardian, I know that much. Marchett might be an old windbag, but at least he’s not a villain.’ He said these unreassuring words levelly, then added, ‘Had you heard that Tarquin was recently married? I pity the poor woman.’
‘So do I. Might it make things worse, with him, if I accepted your offer?’ She said this quietly, half to herself.
‘Well, he has done nothing so far, and he’s had years; it’s all just supposition. But you are asking me if I believe him to be a potential child killer.’
‘I suppose I am. It sounds ridiculously Gothic when said aloud.’
He shrugged and said lightly, ‘Perhaps tales of wicked uncles and villainous plots to trick people out of their fortunes thrill us partly because we know it does happen, or at least, has happened in the murky past. It’s not impossible. Viola, I do not know. I have promised to look after the boys to the very best of my ability. You can be confident I will. I can set guards about them that no one will ever see – not even them. I can talk to my brother, if you wish. Threaten him. But if you are crediting me with supernatural powers of protection…’
‘Of course I am not,’ she said shortly. ‘I’m not a complete fool. But they are at school now, against my wishes. I can see that you remember Lord Marchett well enough. He would not heed my desire to keep them at home, and patronised me in a manner I found close to unendurable. But he also conceded that if I were married and my husband supported me in this plan – this foolish female plan, he all but said – he must reconsider it.’
Ventris smiled rather wolfishly, and his eyes swept over her, his gaze that familiar slow caress across her body. ‘He must assume, of course, that any man who was lucky enough to wed you would have no desire at all to have two great boys about the house when you should be focusing all your attentions onhim. Therefore there is little chance of you receiving such support from any new husband, he must imagine.’
‘That was the implication; I could not miss it, though I’m sure he didn’t mean it to be even slightly flattering, since he dislikes me so. But it’s not true of you, is it?’
‘No. No, my dear, it isn’t. So it is a little unfair of you to accuse me of regarding you in an agricultural light, like some prize cow, when your main reason for considering my offer – perhaps your only one – is to keep Ned and Robin safe from my brother. It seems we have both of us been reduced to a rather primitive level of existence. We might as well live in a cave and go about dressed in skins – not that Ventris is much better than a cave at present. But I am sure I shall not care, if you are with me. I think you’d look rather well in furs and nothing else, like some savage goddess I should worship on my knees.’
His voice was silky and dangerous, and her body flushed with heat, right to the core of her.Some savage goddess, indeed, andon his knees. There was a picture to torment her of a lonely night. She had a sudden thought that if she accepted him and told him so now, he might consider that there was no time like the present, and reach out and touch her… more than that. If she told him she wanted a child for herself, she’d almost be inviting his immediate and intimate attentions. Why wait? The words trembled on her tongue, but she did not utter them, though her whole body was suddenly hot with overwhelming and unwelcome desire.
‘We have been tolerably plain in our discussion,’ he said when she still did not answer him and the silence grew uncomfortably tense between them, with so many things still unspoken on each side. ‘Painfully so, at moments, and yet for a wonder we have not quite fallen to abusing each other. Can it be true that we have a bargain?’
‘I think so,’ she said reluctantly, then realised that for her own pride, she should not allow herself to be swept away so easily. ‘But I will need certain assurances from you, as to your state of health.’
He did blink then, surprised at last. ‘Oh,’ he said slowly. ‘My terrible reputation for indiscriminate amours. Well, this is frank indeed, madam. You realise, of course, that I can give you the assurances you require, but they will only be words, in the very nature of things.’
‘I know that. Nevertheless, I ask for them.’ She saw the distaste on his face and said hotly, ‘You are unfair, sir, to be so squeamish about it. I cannot afford to be so nice. I would risk my life attempting to have a child for you – every woman of childbearing age does, every time she lies down with a man. Men may treat it as a thing of no consequence, but a woman if she is wise does not. I am prepared to take that risk, but I would prefer not to put my life at hazard in any other manner, nor that of any innocent child I may have. I don’t think there’s anything unreasonable about that, so I will not apologise, even if my unladylike frankness does offend you.’
‘You misunderstand the reason for my reaction,’ he said, his face expressionless and unreadable now. ‘I am never offended by honesty. It was self-disgust, perhaps, that such an assumption might be made about my mode of life. And yet I cannot say that it is entirely unfair in you, given what you must believe you know of me. I do not underestimate the risks you take, my dear, nor the size of the debt I shall owe you even for trying, so let us be plain: I do not have the pox, and I have never had it. I have been far more careful than you or anybody else would care to give me credit for. And recently, I have not… I promise you, that at least you need not fear. And Viola, if we marry, I will be faithful. I swear I will, and it is not just empty words, though I know you have little reason to believe me.’
‘Very well.’ She was proud of the steadiness of her voice. ‘I will take you, then, Ventris.’
‘Shall we perhaps celebrate our betrothal, or seal our agreement, if you prefer to look at it like that?’ That silky, seductive tone in his voice again. He had moved yet closer to her. Why had she saidtake,of all words she could have chosen?
She looked up at him – she only had to raise her head a little.
‘You are very brave,’ he said, and reached out one well-shaped hand, his fingers lightly caressing her cheek and tracing the full shape of her lips. ‘But I knew that already.’ His touch sent shivers through her, and she had to fight not to close her eyes against the perilous sweetness of it.
It had been so long since she had had any real physical contact save for the boys’ precious and increasingly rare embraces. At almost eleven, they were already beginning to consider themselves too grown-up for childish cuddles, which cracked her heart. And she did not even want to think how long it had been since anyone had touched her like this, though she could, if she wished, have tallied it up to the year, the month and the day, even the hour. He was going to kiss her, she knew.
All at once, she could not bear it. ‘No,’ she said, and turned her face away from his hand. ‘You said you would respect any stipulation that I cared to make, and I have made none. Well, here is one. We will be married as soon as it can be arranged, I will live wherever you please as long as the boys are with me, but you shall not kiss me.’
His hand fell to his side. ‘I did say that, didn’t I? How rash of me. But madam, if you find me so repulsive, how are we to go on?’
‘You know it’s not that. It would bring back memories I do not care to have revived, that is all.’
‘Let us be clear, then – apart from that, you place no other restrictions on my… conjugal behaviour?’
