Dammit, there we were again with the heavy shit.
“Kind of.” I bit my bottom lip, knowing Brenton would sense the way my pulse picked up. “I mean, they know what we told everyone, but there’s more to it.”
This wasn’t the right time to tell him, not after he’d done everything he could for Finley and, in the process, broke his heart further.
Also, I was cautious, wanting to keep this from him, fearing I’d lose him too. I already hated myself for the way I knew this news would hurt him. I couldn’t handle his hate on top of everything else.
He shifted. “Is this going to be one of those conversations I need to sit down for?”
“Maybe. Probably.”
“Vith,Teddy,”he said lowly.
“Do you want to go back to the house?”
He looked behind us, where the trail looped back to our cabin. A gloominess resettled on his shoulders, making him draw closer to himself.
“There’s a pond not far from here,” he said. “You can tell me there.”
His hand clasped onto mine.
“I’m sorry, Brent.”
He shook his head, his already haunted eyes dulling further. “You did what you had to do to save Donnie’s life. I know that.” His throat bobbed. “Whatever it is, you and Elias will figure it out. I have no doubt about that.”
I let him lead me, my heart straining in my throat. After melting the snow beneath a tall tree, he pulled me down to sit beside him. I leaned my back and head against its thick trunk and held a deep breath in my lungs as the cold, wet ground soaked into my pants. Beside us, the pond sat mostly frozen, with a small trickle filling the silence between us.
I tugged the coat I wore tighter around me as if it were a shield that would protect me against the words I’d yet to say.
“It wasn’t just our magic that we gave up,” I said, carefully eyeing him. “We had to give up our soulmate bond.”
He hissed in a breath, and I held a hand up.
But fuck, it’d hurt to have that bond ripped from me. It was a pain that still echoed in that empty chamber of my soul.
“Let me finish.” I batted away a tear that spilled. “Without the soulmate bond, my life no longer matches that of a fae.”
He stilled, his eyes going impossibly black as he took in what I said.
“I now have a normal human life span again and”—on my lap, I twisted my hands—“Elias chose to match his life to mine.”
George was right. We’d only focused on ourselves and not on anyone else. We’d been selfish, and because of that selfishness, so many would suffer.
Brenton had been alone for so long, without parents orsiblings, but he’d found a family in Elias, George, and Everly. Blood and magic gifted us the sibling bond that still bloomed in my chest, making me feel his pain as if it were my own.
“I’m sorry,” I breathed out.
He blinked several times before he shook his head, and his eyes lightened. “No, Ted, don’t apologize.” He pulled me to his side, where I leaned my head on his shoulder, and he rested his head on mine. “I understand why you did it.” I heard his hard swallow. “It’s fine. It’ll be fine.”
“The babies,” I said, pausing when his body jerked with a violent flinch. I squeezed his hand that sat on my lap. “They’re fine. Elias and I would never choose to do something that would hurt them.”
“I know.” Slowly, his taut body relaxed.
I cupped my unused hand over my stomach. “The boys were conceived when we still had our bond and magic. Because of this, Nalari is certain they will have the same life span as a fae.”
And while I was happy they’d get to live hundreds of years together, with our fae friends and my brother and cousin to love and guide them, knowing we’d leave them far too soon, hurt. Not only that, but any future baby we brought into this world would have the life span of a human, leaving our two boys to endure each of our deaths before they were even adults at 119 years old.
“Will you watch over them after we . . .” I couldn’t finish, not when a sob tore through me. I leaned forward, pressing my knees closer to my chest.
