“What about?”
She looked around and saw that their unusual behavior was already attracting attention.
“Come sit with me.” She led him to a low bench outside the garden, in full view of the ward. They sat down, she with her back straight, he leaning forward, his arms resting on his thighs. He turned to look at her, so that their knees almost touched.
“Are you going to tell me the truth now?” Gareth asked.
“Yes.”Well, part of it,she thought, already resenting his superiority. “I told you that the king gave me Hawksbury. I had been spending a lot of time at court this past spring, and the king and queen grew fond of me.” She tried to smile. “Together, Queen Elizabeth and I were less lonely. We spent many an evening side by side, while she talked to me of the joys and sorrows of her life. I don’t think she had had many friends before me. I even kept her company through a long illness.” She felt herself blushing. “Though they didn’t need to, their majesties insisted on giving me a gift. Not just a pretty box for my jewelry or a new ribbon; they gave me wealth—manors and land.”
Gareth stared down at his hands clasped between his knees. What must he be thinking? She was given easy gifts, while he risked injury and death just to earn his food. Embarrassment burned inside her.
“There is more, is there not?” he asked.
She glanced quickly away, knowing all her choices were gone. “In many ways, my life would be much easier had they not given me a second gift to complement the first. They gave me the freedom to choose my own husband.”
He said nothing for a moment, then he sighed. “Margery, this does not sound like a terrible thing.”
“Think on my words, Gareth. Most women are told whom they shall marry by their parents or their guardians. But since I alone control my choice, every eligible man in England has decided to petition me. Worse yet, the men try to—convince me.”
She saw the exact moment he understood her dilemma. His head came up and he regarded her intensely, the depths of his eyes hinting at a danger that made her shiver.
“Fogge was trying to compromise you for his own purposes?”
She shrugged. “I know not. I only know that lately, men are resisting the word ‘no.’”
They remained silent, listening to the warbling of birds, and the barking of the dogs racing through the inner ward. Margery tried not to think of all the things she wasn’t telling him. And yet?—
He had sought her out, claiming he wanted to help her. There was no one in her household she could confide in. Always, there was the worry that something would get back to the king.
But after all these years, could she trust Gareth to help her?
“Where are your brothers?” he asked.
“They are with the king’s army in the north.”
“Do they know of your problems?”
“How could I tell them? They would not be free to come to my aid, and that would only make them feel worse.” Taking a deep breath, she blurted, “Gareth, you say you’ve come to help me. Would you stay and be my personal guard, at least until I’ve given the king my decision?”
This was just a temporary situation. She couldn’t allow herself to depend on any man. For the rest of her life, she would have only herself.
The silence stretched out, and still he said nothing. He wouldn’t refuse—would he?
“I know I am being forward, but Gareth, I am desperate. I promise that you would enjoy a stay at Hawksbury Castle.”
“And how would you make this task easier?” he asked in a low voice. “There isn’t much about you or your family that I have ever found enjoyable.”
She was stunned by the bitterness in his voice, and the shock of pain that squeezed her chest. What had happened to him? And how could he blame her?
But she would deal with his problems later, if only he’d stay.
“Gareth, will you help me?”
He frowned. “A personal guard? ’Tis an interesting idea. I’ve done more than my share of such work.”
“Then is your answer yes?”
“Where would a personal guard sleep?”
