She gave me a gentle, grateful smile. There was no confusion on her face, no question at the term, as if she’d known from the beginning. Just like that, a bucket of icy realization washed away her hug and reminded me my mother had kept secrets—lots of them.
“You’ve always known, haven’t you?” I lowered my mug, my smile fading.
She bowed her head, unable to meet my accusing stare. “You did it when I was pregnant with you,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “You did a lot of strange things to me while I carried you—even changed the color of the flames in my eyes. At first, I thought the baby in my dreams was just my imagination—until you started doing it at four years old, and I sensed your vast power.”
I dream-walked at four?
“I tried to ignore it, but then I started researching and figured it out. You’d do it when you had nightmares. You’d project into my dreams, crying.” She stared into her fidgeting hands, her voice lowering further. “Sometimes I let you cry it out. But other times… I’d force myself awake so I could wake you, in case?—”
“Someone sensed myvastpowers,” I finished for her, bitterness coating my tongue. She’d kept so many things from me. I was sure there were more.
She nodded. The weight of her silence spoke louder than words, and a faint tremor in her hands betrayed the guilt she couldn’t hide.
“I’m sorry, Lucy. I did what I thought was best. But I didn’t know Michael was working with Marcus. It never occurred to me he would ever ally with a demon…” Her voice cracked as her attention drifted to a long scar on her hand.
The scar from Michael’s knife.
The purple halo around my vision darkened, and I squeezed my cup. “He gave that to you.”
“Sweetie, it’s okay. See? Gone.” The scar vanished.
Heat rose up my neck and pushed behind my eyes. I was so sick of her trying to protect me with lies. None of this wasokay.
“I’m not thirteen anymore! You can’t just cover it up and hope I’ll ignore it—like when I burned our house down. I was there when he slammed that knife into your palm, and I’ll never forget?—”
She reached out and touched my hand, stopping my heated words. A gentle, cooling energy soothed my boiling blood. Maybe she was right. Everything was ok?—
I jerked away, breaking the emotional hold she had over me and spilling hot chocolate.
“Haven’t you learned your lesson?” I banged my mug down on the coffee table and stood. “We can’t hide from everything anymore! You poisoning and calming me to keep me safe backfired! Everything you tried to protect me from went to hell! In fact, we’re both there right now!”
“I’m sorry, Lucy,” she whispered. Her eyes were puffy and bruised, her posture slumped.
And, dammit, how could I stay mad at her when she looked entirely broken?
I sank back into my chair. “You left me so unprepared, Mom. You’re unconscious because of my deal with Michael, and I’m trying to survive while I train and live in a place I’m only beginning to understand—surrounded by beings who hate my guts because I’m worthless and weak! I can’t use my powers without endangeringmyself, you, and potentially the king. We’re stuck in Hell, unable to kill Michael to save you and I—I don’t know what I’m doing.”
I dropped my face into my hands.
My mom knelt before me. She lifted my chin and looked me dead in the eye. “You’re anything but worthless and weak. Now tell me everything from the beginning.”
The tenderness in her voice wrapped around me, and I nodded.
I told her nearly everything that had happened up until today, and she never interrupted. Her eyes would occasionally glaze over, or she’d reach out and squeeze my arm with a trembling hand. But she didn’t try to control the whirlwind of emotions inside me. I think she just needed to reassure herself that I was still here.
I left out details about Aspen, focusing instead on Lilith’s general kidnapping me and the significant events that followed. I couldn’t explain our relationship or what I was planning. How could I? How could I admit that saving him might come before saving her, when my heart was already so heavy with guilt? I couldn’t explain the pull I felt toward him—the raw need pushing me every day to find a way out of Hell. I didn’t understand it myself. But I knew it wouldn’t fade until he escaped Lilith.
When I finished, she gave me a watery smile and hugged me.
“I’m so sorry, Lucy. I never wanted any of this for you. I just wanted?—”
I pulled back. “You wanted us to live as humans and stay safe and sound in our little mountain home.” I surveyed the perfectly imagined house, taking in all the chicken-themed decorations. This was my mom’s haven. But standing in the middle of it, surrounded by all those familiar sights and sounds, I knew it wasn’t mine. “Thatdream of yours has died, Mom. Even if I wanted that life again—which I don’t—there’s no going back while we’re trapped in Hell.”
Her pink cheeks paled. “You were never supposed to end up there.”
“Because of the prophecy?”
She pressed her lips together, the soft notes of her favorite jazz music filling the silence. I took it as a yes.
