“The general doesn’t know how to be kind, Oliver. The king went to great lengths to get us here, and if we died from hypothermia training in his Hell Squadron, it would be his ass. He gave us warm clothes because he needed to, not because he was being kind.”
“Ohkay, you’re probably right. Now, do you want to tell me why he flipped out about Lilith?”
Sighing, I stood, holding onto the general’s sweatpants so they didn’t fall to the ground and show my bare ass. Oliver had to do thesame. At least his didn’t pool by his ankles. “Not here. I’ll tell you in our rooms.”
Rune met us outside the healers’ wing and followed us back. Once we shut our door and both sank into the settee, I told Oliver about my dream-walks with Aspen—leaving out the sexual details.
“Be careful, Lucy. He still could be under the queen’s influence. You can’t trust him completely.”
I considered his words and the dream-walks. The first one made me suspicious, but Aspen explained himself, and it made sense. Everything he said and all his reactions added up. But Oliver was right. Even if he wasn’t runed, he was still near Lilith.
“About that… you do know Ronen’s the general Magda talked about, right? I assumed you did.” But by his expression, he’d totally forgotten what the witch told us. “He’s the one who can save Aspen. Lilith has the general’s feather.”
Oliver laughed—and laughed some more. I knew what he was about to say before he even said it.
“Hate to break it to you, Lucy, but when the general was rescuing you, he was two seconds away from ending Aspen. He only stopped because you were dying. The general hates him. By the sound of it, all of Hell hates Aspen and Lilith. We’re better off trying to steal his feather back and using it ourselves.”
Oliver was right. But if we went up against Lilith without the general, we’d die. We weren’t warriors. We were… flounderers.
Rune rested on the plush rug at our feet. Her fur undulated like the general’s shadows, and as the sinking dread set in, I wished I had as much sway over the general as his Soulhound.
“I don’t know what to do,” I admitted. “Oli, what do we do? I can’t leave him like he is. He can’t stay there doing heaven-knows-what forher. I can’t—I think I might… I…”
“Stop.” Oliver took my shaking hand. “I’m only saying this because I have years on you, but before you say what I think you’ll say, I need you to wait.”
“Why?” I tugged on his hold, not liking where this was headed.
“Why do you have feelings for him?”
“He cares about me. He protects me.”He makes me feel like no one ever has.
Oliver pursed his lips, frustration thickening his voice. “I didn’t know carting you to his evil queen was protection.” I opened my mouth to protest, but he didn’t give me a chance. “I care about you. I try to protect you. Do you love me?”
“Not like that.”
“So, is it his good looks? Because if it is, you might want to reconsider—I’d say the general ranks above the prince in that department.”
My irritation spiked. “You know the answer to that. Aspen…” My voice faltered as I tried to explain. “He makes me feel safe. Seen, like I matter. He’s different.”
“Seen how, Lucy? What do you even know about him? What does he even know about you?” Oliver pressed.
I gritted my teeth. Why did it matter to him?
“What is the point of this conversation? Are you jealous? Do you want me like that?” I blurted, knowing it was absurd the moment I said it.
He sighed, a long, weary exhale. “No, I love you like a sister, Luce. But someone needs to look after you therightway. Your family’s coping mechanisms are messed up—abuse, overprotective to an extreme, and possessive indifference—it’s not healthy. If you love the prince, fine, love him. We’re rescuing his ass either way, I know that.” His voice softened. “But seriously, Lucy, ask yourself why. I may not know all that’s gone on between the two of you, but I do know the look in your eyes when you speak of rescuing him scares me.”
“What look?”
“The look where you’d give absolutely everything for him—even your life.”
My head dipped as shame burned in my gut—and something else I couldn’t name.
“Would that be so bad?”
“Didn’t we already talk about giving too much of yourself?Your lifeis on that damned list, Lucy. And I just…” He trailed off, a deep unease settling into his voice. “I have this feeling.”
“A feeling?” I pulled away and stood. “That’s what you’re going off? A feeling?”
