She pulls me close, her arms strong and comforting, and I feel a warmth I didn’t realize I’d been missing. “Oh, Sutton,” she says, her voice thick with affection. She pulls back just enough to look at me, her hands resting on my shoulders. “Look at you. So beautiful and so grown up. I’m so proud of you, sweetheart. I’ve been following your career, and you’re…you’re doing great things.”
Her words make my cheeks flush, and I smile, ducking my head slightly. “Thank you. That means a lot.”
She fusses over me for a moment, brushing imaginary dust off my shirt and tucking a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “Now, tell me,” she says, her tone turning playful, “are there any handsome cowboys in your life?”
I laugh, shaking my head. “Not a single one.”
Mrs. Callahan clicks her tongue in mock disapproval. “Well, that’s a shame. A girl like you is such a catch. I’m sure that special one is out there for you. May even find him on this ranch.”
We both laugh, and it feels like I’m a kid again, standing in this same yard, listening to her gentle wisdom.
“I don’t date cowboys, Mrs. C,” I chuckle.
“That’s what they all say at first,” she teases. Suddenly, she sighs and her demeanor changes. “How’s the herd? Boys said we lost another few overnight.”
“Still working on figuring things out,” I admit. “But I’m hopeful we’ll get to the bottom of it soon. I’m working hard on eliminating possibilities. I got some good samples yesterday and have someone en route to pick them up today. I set up some protocols with the guys, and if I can get them to listen, I’ll figure it out sooner than later.”
She nods. “You will, Sutton. If anyone can, it’s you. If anyone can keep these ornery cowboys in line, that’s also you.”
“I have a knack for it. I guess it comes from being the only daughter of a man who wanted a son…and the only girl around working the ranch.”
“Your daddy adores you; don’t let him make you believe differently,” she says softly. “He’s just a little too rough around the edges for an old cowboy.”
I suck in a breath and tears prick at my eyes. Just like Mama, Mrs. C is making excuses for my daddy’s bad behavior. It’s hard for a man to change or even know that he should when people aren’t holding him accountable.
I want to say as much, but it’s not worth it. They don’t know the same man I do. He doesn’t treat them like he treats me, like I can never do anything right or good enough.
“It’s how he was raised.”
“Cowboys don’t show emotions, makes ’em look weak.”
“He don’t know no better.”
“Be glad he don’t beat ya all day long like my daddy did.”
“Aw, that’s just how he shows love. He holds you to a higher standard.”
“Ain’t your daddy’s place to show you love; it’s your mama’s.”
“He’s around cattle and cowboys all day; he don’t know how to speak to a woman.”
“He’s grieving your mama. They were a match made in heaven and you should give him some grace and just ignore what he said. He ain’t mean it.”
Those were just some of the ridiculous things people said to me when they saw Daddy yell at me or heard me complain about him. It’s just the way of the cowboy according to our little small town. I might have believed that if I didn’t see Mr. Callahan treating Wade differently. If I hadn’t seen Dez’s dad treat her like a princess. When I went to my first sleepover and saw that dad loving on his daughter and wife, being kind to his children and their friends, I thought I was in an old fifties’ sitcom. That’s when I realized my dad was an asshole, and it only got worse.
I bite my tongue and shake my head. All those comments people have made to me in the past as to why my daddy acted the way he did.
“Aren’t all cowboys?” I say lightly.
If I don’t make a joke about it, I might cry.
“They’re all soft on the inside once you get to know them. I guess that’s why it’s even more special to fall in love with one. The rest of the world sees their harshness, but you…you get to see that softer side.”
She makes it sound so romantic, and…I’ve never known it to be more than heartbreak. People could say what they wanted, but I never even saw my daddy be soft with my mama. He was rough and gruff, and I don’t know why she took it all those years. He never laid a hand on her, but his coldness and distance had to have been debilitating, but she never let it show.
Wade wasn’t the only cowboy I fell for in Texas. There were a couple of others whose traps I fell into, all emotionallyunavailable men who did their best to live up to the stereotype Marshal Matt Dillon set for them all: love a good woman, but never settle down.
“I should get to the barn.”
