“I’m not kidding, Jules. Let’s do this, me and you. I’m ready. No, that’s not the right word. I’ve been waiting, and life has mixed us up in a million ways, but I’m ready if you’re ready. I’ll do whatever it takes. Move to Washington. Give up Taco Bell—”
“Don’t be crazy now...” I tease.
“Oh, I’ll do it though. Because I’m crazy about you. Even when I’ve pretended not to be. You wrecked my world and flipped it on its head and I don’t want another day to go by where the world doesn’t know I’m yours and you’re mine.”
“Are you being possessive?” I ask, leaning closer.
“Quit messing around, I’m serious.” He stares down at me.
I smile. “Keep talking.”
“It feels like I have loved you in a million different lives and in a million different ways. And I’m still not done. I want to love you forever. I don’t think I can live without you, Jules. I thought I could but I can’t. The world spins a different directionwhen you’re in the room. Gravity doesn’t exist. The wind stops blowing. My heart beats to the sound of your voice.You.”
He’s not being cut off. It’s a complete sentence—one my heart hears profoundly.You.
“I’m dropping my life because you’re worth dropping it for.”
I hold my breath, collecting my thoughts and emotions in my throat. My self-preservation gets the best of me, even with the pressure of an audience. “If I’m completely honest, Ihaveloved you and I’ve let my heart be broken by you then healed too many times, JP. Because it’s never worked out. It’s been five years and it’s never worked out.”
His jaw clenches. “When did you fall out of love with me, though?”
“Don’t. That’s not fair.” I shake my head.
“Jules, when?” The rumble of his voice sends vibrations down my spine. He continues to have a way to undo me. My hesitation overrides my heart. As I try to find the right words to say, he pulls two very worn pieces of paper out of his wallet and places them in his hand.
Two fortunes written in Times New Roman that meant absolutely nothing but remind me of everything. “When did you fall out of love with me, Jules?” he repeats.
I swallow. “I haven’t,” I admit.
He scoops me in his arms, and I hug him with my whole heart, and the plane cheers.
It’s embarrassing, but it’s also beautiful. We take our seats and he wipes the tears from under my eyes.
“JP, I’ve spent a good portion of the last five years wanting to love you, knowing I couldn’t. But now you’re here in front of me and I don’t know how to make this real.”
He thinks for a moment. “When we first met, you told me you didn’t do second chances.”
The reminder makes me laugh.
“What about ninth chances?”
My eyes feel sore even if my heart is painfully hopeful.
“I’m not leaving. Not unless you ask me to,” he says, just as the flight attendant gets on air to announce the doors are now closed and it’s time to make sure our seatbelts are securely in place. “I mean that figuratively.”
I laugh as we both fasten our seatbelts in the same seats we were in when we met on a plane five years ago. “Clearly,” I say, then lean over the armrest.
You’ll begin where you began.
“Are you going to take me out?”
JP smiles, taking my hand in his, and I avert my gaze from the vein wrapping around his forearm. “I’ll take you wherever you want to go. Tonight. Tomorrow. Next week. Next year. I have a feeling I’ll do whatever you tell me to.”
My heart does that weird flutter thing that makes me feel like a teenage girl whose hand was held for the first time, not the thirty-something-year-old woman I am.
“I love you, Jules. I’m desperate for you. You’re the life I didn’t know I needed to live—the love I didn’t know I could feel.”
I want to scream,yes, yes, me too. Instead, I say, “I love it when you say my name.”
