“So, this is a personal chat, not a professional one.” Tamsyn respected Fred both as her superior and as the man who took her in when she had no one. He didn’t have to do that, and she would be forever grateful to both him and Anna.
However, there were times when she wished Fred would stand up to Anna. Her childhood had been filled with ridicule and shame. While her home life had been a safe haven, she had always felt like an outsider, especially when it came to Anna. As if she’d been an interloper in her life. It didn’t matter that Anna met every physical need she had because she lacked the one quality she needed most.
The love of a true family.
Fred tried to pull it all together, but he failed too.
It wasn’t entirely their fault. In the beginning, they gave her space. Time to get used to their living arrangement and respecting her dream that her mom would soon return. But over time, Anna wanted the town to see them as a happy family from the outside, when they were merely three people who lived under one roof.
“It’s a little bit of both.” He leaned back, folding his arms. “Anna is quite upset and to be honest, I’m not thrilled about this situation with the River family either.”
“If you’re referring to me dating Noir, it’s not a situation.” She gripped the sides of the chair. “I didn’t mean for you and Anna to find out this way. I had intended on telling you tonight. Anna barging into the Rivers’ home was an unexpected complication.”
“That’s an interesting way of putting it,” Fred said. “How long have you and Noir been secretly an item?”
“A little over a month.” She resented how this felt as though she were being interrogated. She wasn’t a child who stayed out past curfew. Not that she’d ever done that. She’d been a model teenager regarding grades and following Fred’s rules. She did, however, occasionally break Anna’s.
“Why didn’t you tell us?”
“Partly because I knew how Anna would react, and partly because I wanted to keep it private until I was ready to deal with the bullshit this town is going to throw at us.” She shifted, lifting an envelope from her back pocket that had been burning a hole in it for the last ten minutes. She pushed it across the table. “I’m starting to think I should take out an ad in the paper or maybe release this to the press.”
Fred lifted it, raising it to the light. “What is this?”
“A paternity test I had Carter take ten years ago, proving he’s not my father.”
“Well, I knew that wasn’t true.” Fred whistled. “Why on God’s green earth have you been sitting on this for all these years?” He glanced over the document. “We’ve talked about this. I’ve chatted with Carter. But why didn’t you give me this? I’m shocked that Weezer hasn’t been shouting it from a bullhorn.”
“I have a dozen reasons why, but they all seem stupid now,” she said. “I care about Noir. I want you to be okay with this. I need you to be on my side.”
“You mean when it comes to Anna? Or with everyone else?”
“Both,” Tamsyn said.
“When it comes to Anna, that’s a tough one.” Fred handed the paper back and rested his arms on the desk. “Weezer has never made it easy for Anna in this town. Not when they were kids and certainly not now. I don’t see Anna accepting this relationship. I know you don’t see us as your parents. I understand that, but Anna doesn’t. And she only wants what’s best for you, and she won’t see Noir as being anything other than bad.”
“He’s a good man, and you know it.”
Fred cocked his head. “I never said he wasn’t. But he’s a River. He’s Weezer’s son. Anna will never change her mind regarding how she feels about that family.” Fred ran a hand over his mouth, his index finger and thumb meeting at the tip of his square jaw. “I’m not a fan of Weezer either, but I have no beef with Noir or the rest of her kids. That said, there are hundreds of other men in this town. You had to pick him? Really? That’s an uphill battle that I can’t imagine will end well.”
“Once the gossip settles down, and it will, time will tell.”
“Look, I love you like my own, you know that.”
While she believed Fred cared deeply, she had never felt that strong bond she should have for the two people who gave her so many opportunities. She carried a pang of guilt for that.
“The moment anyone in this town gets wind of you dating Noir, and that will be by morning light, I’m sure, you will be dealing with the same whispers, same stares, same bullshit that turned you into the most quiet, reserved little girl I brought into my home at the age of ten. You didn’t blossom into the strong-willed, stubborn pain in the ass woman you are today until you turned twenty and grew a voice.”
“I do have you to thank for that, but Anna wouldn’t mind squelching my tenacity, and she hates half my opinions.”
“She doesn’t like to be challenged,” Fred said.
“No, she doesn’t.” Tamsyn rolled her neck. “I know I’ve asked this a dozen times. But I’m going to ask it again. Do you have any idea who my biological father is?”
“I wish I did because I’d like to give that man a piece of my mind,” Fred said. “Anna and I could never have children. It’s something that I wish I could have given her, but it wasn’t in the cards. We were looking into adoption when you came into our lives. Something we’re grateful for, but not the circumstances in which it happened. However, if I do ever come face-to-face with the man who got your mom pregnant and walked away, I will toss my badge temporarily in the garbage and kick the shit out of him.”
Tamsyn had heard the speech a million times and each time it warmed her heart. Fred wasn’t a fiery man. He didn’t get passionate about many things. He was a rule guy and following the letter of the law mattered; it was the one thing he truly believed in. Seeing that kind of emotion emoting from his eyes was the one time she truly felt loved by him, and she would always hold on to that.
“You should know I did do the whole DNA thing. Finding my father is important to me.”
