Samantha straight up laughed, and a few people turned to glare at us.
Rita folded her arms.“You show me where in the city bylaws restrictions on lawn decorations are mentioned, and I’m happy to take them down.”
Bob sighed, utterly defeated.“She’s got you, Ricky.There’s nothing I can officially do here.”
“And, Your Honor,” Rita jumped in, “I’d like to formally request that you make Ricky give me back my five-foot plastic Santa.”
“I didn’t take—”
“Yes, you did!”She pointed an accusing finger.“Don’t you lie, Ricky!”
Bob groaned.“Ricky, did you take her Santa?”
“Bob, this is ridic—”
“I know it’s in his garage, Your Honor.I’d like permission for a rescue mission; anything it takes to free it from captivity.”
“Ricky, did you take her Santa?”
Ricky hesitated.“I plead the Fifth.”
“You can’t plead the Fi—You know what?Ricky, give the Santa back.And close your blinds.Rita, get rid of the reindeer.At least the one with the broken antler and missing eye—that thing scares my grandkids.And no Christmas lights after ten p.m.”He took a deep breath.“Alright, next up, Austin Marcs.”
“Buckle up,” I whispered to Sam as I stood.
“Just here to request permission for extended ferry operation hours, Bob.I need to schedule a few more runs to the island.”
Ricky shot to his feet again.“Why?Are we bringing more people to the island?Do we really need to do that?”
Sam pulled on my arm and mouthed,What is he doing?
“Yes, we do.It’s tourist season and we have the typical influx of visitors.But I’m already sold out for the month.I need to extend hours to get a few more runs in.Early morning doesn’t tend to go over well with guests, so I’d like to request evening hours.”
Ricky pursed his lips and crossed his arms, looking to Bob like he expected an overwhelming agreement.
“Yes, Austin, we’ve discussed and the board agrees, extended hours are fine.”
Ricky huffed.“What about city noise ordinances?He’ll be in direct action against them.”
Samantha stood up beside me.
“Ricky, is it?”Sam asked, her tone polite but sharp enough to turn heads.
Ricky squinted at her, suspicious.“Yeah?”
Sam smiled sweetly, but there was an edge to it.“I’m sure you know that the noise ordinance doesn’t apply to marine vessels on the water after sunset.It’s covered under section twelve, subsection C of the city code.”
Ricky’s expression faltered, his arms dropping to his sides.“Well—uh—”
“And,” Sam continued, not missing a beat, “even if it did, the ordinance allows for exceptions when the noise is connected to public transportation or tourism-related activities.Which a ferry service qualifies as.Isn’t that right, Bob?”
Bob blinked, a little stunned, then nodded.“That’s… correct.”
Samantha tilted her head, all charm.“So, technically, unless there’s another complaint you’d like to file—maybe about the city’s support of small businesses?—I don’t think Austin’s request goes against sound ordinances.”
I stared at her, impressed.I didn’t see that coming.
Ricky fumbled for a response.“I just—I don’t think—”
