I leaned my back against the wall, unable to stop the tears that started to fall one by one.
It wasn't easy for me to have this baby. I was completely alone with no one to turn to, and to have Morgan trying to harm me and my baby was even worse.
I swallowed a lump in my throat, thinking about Luke.
I missed him. I missed him so much that it hurt.
I wished that he was here with me, but the only thing I could hold on to was his word. His promise. I hoped that he wouldn't change his mind if he knew that I was pregnant with his child.
He would come back for us, wouldn't he?
Seven years was a long time. How was I going to survive that? How was I going to survive Morgan?
Thinking that she could attempt to harm my baby again was enough to make me go crazy. I couldn't let that happen.
What should I do? I didn't know anything about Luke. I didn'tknow how to find him. If I stayed with Morgan for seven years, which I could imagine would be hell, was it all worth it?
Would Luke really pick me up after seven years?
I touched my belly, feeling great pain in my chest. I had to be strong for my child. If I was sad, my baby would be too.
I shouldn't feel stressed. The movement inside my tummy became rapid, and I gently caressed it. I soothed, trying to calm down.
I sang a lullaby even though my voice was shaking. It did work. My baby calmed down. My tears kept pouring down as I silently talked to my child.
Don't worry, my baby. I'm here for you. We're always together. I can't imagine my life without you. We're going to wait for daddy together.
He'll come back for us.
He would love you just as much as I do if he were here with us. You don't have to worry about anything in this world, because I will protect you no matter what.
Your daddy is my Neptune. Just like the story in mythology, he makes me feel as though I'm in dreams and illusions, sometimes with vagueness and uncertainty.
He's my Neptune, but you are my sun.
You're the light that gives me hope. You're the strength that keeps me going.
You're myeverything.
43
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CASSIE
Seven Years Ago
Eight months pregnant
My eyes scanned the titles of the books on the bookstore shelf. I was trying to find a book about parenting—I wanted to be a good mother for my child.
I could just browse through articles on the web, but spending time outside my house once in a while didn’t hurt.
In fact, I preferred being outside my house because Morgan scared me. Being inside my house wasn't safe anymore.
"Look, she's really pregnant," I heard a girl whisper around me. "People say that she doesn't even know who the father is."
"How could she be so stupid?" another girl whispered. "No wonder he left her."
