I’m going to regret this.
“You smoke?”Blaze asks, taking a long drag of his cigarette, his eyes gleaming with mischief as he exhales a cloud of smoke that curls around him lazily.
I just finished washing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen after dinner.I’d planned to sneak back to my room quietly, but Blaze called me over, and now here I am, sitting with Fox and his friends in the living room as they smoked and played violent video games.Not exactly how I wanted to spend my evening.
“Of course he doesn’t smoke.Let the girl be, Blaze.”Fox mutters without looking up from the screen.He barely hides the disdain in his voice.It’s like he’s disgusted by everything I do, and it’s exhausting.
Blaze ignores Fox and grins at me, offering the cigarette.“You should give it a try.Just one puff.”
“Yeah, come on, Cameron,” Carter adds with a chuckle.“It won’t kill you.”
I shake my head.“No thanks.I don’t smoke.”
Fox scoffs loudly, and I feel his stare cutting into me.“I told you.He’s a girl.”
And just like that, my frustration flares.What is his problem?Ever since I moved in, I’ve been nothing but decent to him.Why does he always have to make it seem like I’m some kind of burden?
For a moment, I wonder if I crossed some invisible line by simply existing.One minute, we’re having a relatively normal conversation—maybe even bordering on friendly—and the next, he’s back to being the same obnoxious jerk.
Blaze nudges me again with the cigarette, clearly enjoying the tension.“You’re breaking my heart, Cameron.”
I sigh, trying to push down the irritation building in my chest.Blaze is the only one of Fox’s friends I can stand.He’s easygoing and, weirdly, the nicest of the bunch.Plus, I can’t deny he’s good-looking, but he doesn’t make me feel like crap the way Fox does.
“Alright, fine.I’ll try it,” I finally say, extending my hand toward Blaze.
The moment I say that, I feel Fox’s eyes on me, his judgment palpable.I ignore him as Blaze hands me the cigarette, grinning widely.
“That’s my man!”Blaze laughs, and Carter joins in.
I take a long drag, and instantly, I regret it.The harsh smoke burns my throat and lungs, sending me into a coughing fit.I clutch my chest, coughing harder than I ever have in my life.Why do they make this look cool?It feels like I’m dying.
Blaze is at my side in an instant, looking both amused and concerned.“Shit, man, you okay?”
I manage to nod, but my coughing fit doesn’t let up.Fox, sitting on the other side of the room, smirks at my misery.I refuse to meet his eyes.
“Fucking dumbass,” Fox mutters under his breath.
“I’m just…gonna get some water.”I stand up quickly and head to the kitchen, desperate for an escape.Grabbing a bottle from the fridge, I take several deep gulps, letting the cool liquid soothe the burning in my throat.
I lean against the counter, hands pressed against the cool surface, the sting of embarrassment creeping under my skin like a slow burn.Why did I even try?To prove something to Blaze?To act like I belonged?
ToFox?
It always feels like I’m being measured—against what, I don’t know.Some impossible standard I can’t ever quite reach.And no matter what I do, I fall short.
A voice from the living room cuts into my thoughts.
“Foxy baby,” a girl coos, sugary sweet and unmistakably smug.
I glance over.
Of course.She’s blonde.
She leans over the back of the couch and kisses him—full on the lips like she owns him.I should look away.Iwantto.But I don’t.I can’t.My feet are rooted to the floor, my chest tightening with something I can’t name.
She’s different from the others.Tall.A little curvy.Gorgeous in that effortless way that makes you hate her a little.Her makeup’s flawless, her smile practiced.I can’t tell if she’s just another hookup or something more… but Fox doesn’t exactly strike me as the “commitment” type.
And seriously, whatishis deal with blondes?
